selamat datang

photography anyone?

2008-08-01T08:28:00.000-07:00

more on my flickr account.just click at my side bar= ))
cya!!

Forever

2008-07-17T06:19:00.000-07:00

forever i will remember all the feelings that i get when im with you
forever i will replay the soft soothing words of yours in my head
and forever i will be yours.
we're 7 months in 2 days.
we've been through perfect happiness all this while.
never fought,just argue and laugh at the end of the minute.
how amazing u can make me feel.
clock ticks and not a second i dont think of you.
serious baby,i love you..and no one else could ever take that away.
sayang sangat at you,shahrin ismail.

MERCY!!

2008-05-25T21:50:00.000-07:00

No,not duffy's mercy(if im not mistaken her albums called mercy,rite?) but its MERCY MERCY the band.Their demos out now only Rm 5.four songs.GET THEM NOW!

listen to their songs here:
myspace.com/moonamusica

7/10 overall.my own personal ratings= )

cinema-tic problem

2008-05-22T06:27:00.000-07:00

I have yet to tell you about the terrible cinema 1 at Klcc,Well,lets just not be too hard on this,It may be the only time that it was terrible and i,along with say 50 other people were just unlucky.However,I cant stop but to think of such problem to occur after 50 years of independence and especially at a cinema in the building the whole world knows and wishes to visit.

Around last month,I was offered by my generous cousin and his wife to watch ironman.Being someone who loves going into the cinema just for the sake of the big screen and the big sound system which i always get excited upon,how could i resist such an offer.I said yes without hessitation.Ironman wasnt something i looked forward to but as i told you,i always get excited in the cinema no matter what.As we got in the cinema,we went straight to our seats,of course pfft,which was fairly positioned-not too close to the screen.My favourite place to set my arse down and the best view for my eyes is actually the last row of the cinema.Im not complaining,im just saying,incase you were thinking of belanja-ing me a movie =p.

Ok wokay,as i was saying,we settled down at our seats and as usual theres these ads right which took some time from the movie.Thats the norm and everyone forgives and gives chance for ads already these days. Losing the long sighs and patiently chewing their pop corns with drowsy eyes set on the big screen and body slowly and subconsciously sinking in their seats.Until the movie starts people will start sitting straight on their seats again,eyes wide open and suddenly chewing their pop corn with loads of epitite like they were chewing ham burgers.Their hearts suddenly pound faster for no reason,excitement i believe though,and minds were 'panicked' with curiosity.Too bad i did not have a bucket of pop corn with me.If not,thats how id be.Ironman started and it stopped the beating hearts of people seconds later.It had no sound and the movie did not stop.Worse,the starting was when the bomb exploded(in the movie).How can you watch a bomb explode with no sound?You cant feeeeeel the terror the thing that makes you inadvertanly fall back at your seats,the thing that gives you the extra speed as your heart races.Instead it crashes our hearts,a massive dissapointment.People started with the 'Oiiii APE NI!WOI WOI" and i went "HARGGHHHHH BOTO"=p

Well,seriously,it dissapoints us.11 buck tickets,i was angry and i didnt even pay for the ticket.The movie re-started and again,mute.An announcement was made to say that there was a techinical problem and were told to stay calm.We waited 10 minutes or so and thankfully,the movie went smoothly later.A refund or discount should be something we should have asked for but i guess people forgive,just like with the ads.
= )
&&& before i forget,I didnt expect ironman to be that good.3 stars if i were to rate.Worth the wait.
That is all folks.

lately

2008-04-21T02:37:00.001-07:00

Im still very much alive right now despite not doing much and basically rotting at home losing my mind waiting for the acceptance letter to enter university.Recently i went for a mass comunication interview at uitm shah alam with pretty much confidence in myself.I brought something extra-a huge file of my portfolio which includes everything that i've done,my artwork that is,which I though was quite necessary for this interview.As i reached uitm,i discovered that it wasn't (necessary) and i was,in hundreds, the only one who brought a portfolio.Everyone came with just a small file of certificates.I didn't bother if I was 'the girl with a file bigger than her',but honestly i wished i didn't bring that along.You see,my intention was to show the interviewer(s) of what Im capable of doing you know,besides just talking sense like what i believe others who went for the interview was ready for.So its just a lil something extra-i thought.Until,my turn came rite,and i was so ready to create a convincing conversation with them.First thing I said to them,as i enter the room was about my portfolio.I told them i had something extra with me.And they were impressed with my work,seriously.Too impressed that we end up talking about my talent and they felt that its a waste fr me to take up mass communications as i deserve so much to be in an art and design course.Personally,i know i am all suite up to do art and design but i've thought about it and i want to do mass communications.So,they asked me a few questions like why i want mass comm and why uitm.I answered,trying my best to get them into interviewing me on mass com rite,like what I WAS THERE FOR.Heck,it didnt work.They kept telling me how good n incredible my talent is and i should go try out for ad interview.I didn't want to lose,i felt like crying.I told them,again,this..is..what..i..want.I don't know if i'm convincing enough.So heres what they said at last:-call up uitm and try out for ad interview tell them u din not get mass com.lyana,we like you,really,just try out for the interview,at least you'll have TWO OPTIONS later on to choose from.They're freaking twisting my head.Are you going to accept me or not.If im ok,if you really like me why don't you just accept me.You don't ask people to take up something they don't want.So I went out of the room feeling very2 miserable and regreted bringing my portfolio along.But by studying their faces,i still believe that they will,still,accept me in mass com.Ill just pray for now.But,screw you,i don't know if i should be mad at the both of you but you got me into being a bigtime moody n miserable pig.Yes,i feel like a pig.

rub it off.Im done thinking and i'll wait patiently for now.

sometimes...

2008-03-11T08:42:00.000-07:00

sometimes.........

byk pikir
rasa still hard to get around with people
i feel stupid
rasa want to go bck to childhood days
rasa want to fast forward
rasa xnk duk msia wanna stay somewhere else
rasa want a newlife
missing the old times with my brothers and miss being the centre of attention
rasa everything i do or say aint right
rasa i dont deserve the good
rasa people take me for granted
i can be neurotic
i care too much what people think of me
i just don't bother
i feel like a coward
lifes just so sucky n cruel.
i feel defeated.
i need someone badly

insecurities.xhabes2 haunting me.im such a 'negative creep'

blade o blada= )

2008-03-10T05:12:00.000-07:00

Whats been up besides my business?

Heres the cliche line.Lifes pretty much the same.Im 18 and Im like most other 18 year olds,who decided to wait for the results and not to go to college.I don't know if I have a solid reason to not go to college but I have again,like most 18 year olds,few selfish reasons to not go to college: I was afraid I won't get the time to 'enjoy' and do whatever I want if I were in college right after spm.Secondly,I am not ready to get my brains to work and to learn new serious subjects which also means i am too lazy and in need of a break from studying.Thirdly,well theres no third reason.I guess if I were already in college i won't get the chance to do alot of things:

I won't get the chance to develop my art and get myself involve in business.I do see this as a learning process actually.I think i've learn how to appreciate money more compared to before.Although i've always knew that to earn money is not easy,but it was just not more than knowing that fact.Now,i've actually experienced it myself,going through all the hard work trying to get a single penny of my own.It is not easy peasy but the satisfaction you'll get after is such a pleasure.I just can't imagine how my dad works.I mean I feel like my life is too comfortable,getting everything i want,I don't see a single problem.He gives me everything.I just feel guilty-for not getting good grades and using loads of his money.Well,results will be out this wednesday and I'm so afraid to disapoint my parents.But what's done is done,I'll do good next time I guess.No use crying over spilt milk right.

Moreover,if I were already in college,I'll probably won't get the chance to spent time as much as i've spent with my boyfriend and getting to know him more.I'll most probably forget about him and hook up with another guy from college or staying single and being flirty like I was after school ended.Well,you know,the 'girls just wanna have fun' thingy.I'll probably won't get the chance to even know what a great friend he is,won't get the chance to meet his lovely friends and lets just say,i don't think he'll even be in my life chapter.

Besides that,getting into college that early would make me miss loads of gigs.I do enjoy going to gigs,supporting local bands as well as meeting new people.My social life definitely has improved so much more by getting involved in these things.I mean,i now mix with people easily compared to before,I only hang with my close friends.I've also learned to be more friendly to people.hihi.Not to say that I was not friendly before but I just did not bother much of other people.;)

I might not also get the chance to have my vacation in Perth,Australia this may with my momma if I were in college.Yes,I'll miss teh chance to have fun during winter there!Plus this time around i'll only be going with mama alone,just the two of us,leaving the rest of the family behind.My dad was moody for a week or so when we decided to go there.He ended up buying himself a new car.Ah well,whatever makes you happy,papa=)Ill also miss the happy moments i spent with mama.Going for breakfast,lunch or just hanging out getting a drink and talking crap.Im not ready to leave her alone.Im too close to her.huhu yeah,anak mama.

Oh!college would also cost my dad alot.I mean,it didn't matter if I were as smart and as hard working as KOng Lee Lian or Kushin kaur or Shamine Sanusi-my babes=p.If I were them,I guess i won't be wasting my dad's money,it'll be worth it.So,yeah,few selfish reasons that i could think of for not going to college so soon.And i guess i've spent my break very well.I didn't waste my time and doing nothing.Though i must admit that going to British Council didn't really helped me much.I still have problem speaking,getting my words right and my writting didn't improve too.It helped me a little but you know,not much.Ill finish by end of march if I'm not mistaken.Can't wait though.lol.I don't really enjoy going there,for some reasons.

godddd,my heart just races everytime i think of the results this wednesday.I am going to faint.
wish me luck.Though,could i possibly get lucky still?miracle perhaps?That will so do!
cheers everyone= )

SOLD OUT!!!!

2008-03-09T10:21:00.000-07:00

ALL S.K.I.P ART stuffs are sold out!
s.k.i.p art's first event at mcpa,9th march 08,managed to sell all of my stuff!thank you people!thank you thank you.=D
For those who were A LIL late to get one of my shirts,i'll print more soon okay?But now im up for a new design because i want something fresh!hehehe.

bdw,MANY THANKS TO:
1.fye and havana clothing
thanx for selling together and sharing the same booth just now.

2.my dear boyfriend
for helping me out at the booth and for making me happy=p but danggggg,i u farted TWICE at me today!give warning so that i can get away before u freaking release ur gas! tgk ah hang,aku kumpui gas aku byk2 dulu,kentut kat muka hang!sampai pengsan!

3.dear friend capik
tumpang kereta,anta umah.heheh.tq;p

4.qib and rest of my cuzins who came to mcpa just now
thanx teman jaga booth skali.and sonok dapat kuar mamam later that nite

5.zaxx my ex-booth neighbour=p (aliff yang mana then?)
for ur demo.yeay!i got one!!

6.my dad!
i know...i know....i was home too late..but i HAD to watch oag performed!!!but i guess midnites too late for a 18 year old girl to come home.sry to make u n mama angry and worried.didnt mean too,im serious.thanx for not scolding me when i got home just now..

THANK YOU once again.i've now get to taste success.more to come!perserverence freaking work!good thing i didnt give up last time when i didnt have customers and wasted loadsss of money.
cant do without you people.
i love all of u=' )

BANNER!

2008-03-06T02:08:00.000-08:00

S.K.I.P ART BANNER!
Put this at ur page to show your support.hehehehehe
more designs soon okay.Curently busy trying to sell off my stuff,finishing the undone custom orders,and and and my brains pretty dry with ideas and inspiration.ehehe.
So,hope you guys await patiently.

love,
yours truly.

S.K.I.P ART!

2008-02-29T08:48:00.000-08:00

people people!!my yummy printed items have arrived!!

ladies tees!RM25 each!
TWO LEFT!i manage to sell.very fortunate.but no worries im printing more this week hopefully.
thank you buyers!thanx for the support!

here are the matching bags!
7 bags left!
rm 12 each

dont forget about this handmade one.still up for sale= )

and this:order now!handmade rm 35

i hope to have new designs soon and more money for new printings.await for s.k.ip art's next edition!
THANK YOU so much!

UPCOMING EVENTS:ill be here!

yours truly.

Two a.m

2008-02-28T09:59:00.000-08:00

randomness+boredom+insomnia

what songs keep you singing
what do they mean to you.
what you want
is what you do to me.

What thoughts keep you thinking
what makes us who we are.
what you think of me
is what I am to you.

sing for me
think of me
what we do
is what brings us to where we are.

As you can see,ive lost half of my mind.
results were not out yesterday as rumoured.rumours roumours.stop spreading them.Ive waited anticipatedly and with anxiety and curiosity.The eagerness to know my grades just burned out!
Friends,where are you??my hot babes.I miss you bitches.

Kushwin,i know your busy but ive also heard ur out clubbing pretty often.woooooman,you better get your licence done,take me out and i'll sleep wherever you're sleeping after.

Kong lee lian,i know your busy and taylor's your second home now but you have to take a break and hang with me,again.

Jane,i know your currently as free as i am,but where the hell are you??

Shal,i heard you're in sunway now and that is all.

raja,repeat what i say on shal.

aneesha,ive heard you came back from plkn recently but do you realize that we have not talked to each other eversince school ended?im textin you tomorrow!

chris,I have not a clue if you're dead or alive.

maureen,sweetie i miss you.

everyones scattered too far from each other.i want a reunion!!!!!

its a gig dude@mcpa

2008-02-24T10:36:00.000-08:00

Again mcpa is the place for gigs.Yesterday had the 'its a gig dude' gig there and as usual the turn out was awesome.Its good to see people supporting our local acts,being there moshing,jumping, and headbanging to locals' very improved and rising bands.Among who performed were bunkface(fuck,i missed their show!),have a nice death,our very own kajang band hijau as the opening act,black territory,couple and few more.It was a disapointment for hujan fans though as they did not turn up at their show for some crucial reasons I supposed.Anyways,it was great.I also finally had the chance to meet up with my cousin belle whom i havent seen for months!I missed her so.Also,before the gig i had this little celebration with my boyfriend,just the two of us at kenny rogers in times square.It was to celebrate mine and his belated bday as well as our belated anniversary.As we arrived at mcpa we hanged and hanged before we got into the gig.I tried seeling my s.k.i.p art t-shirt but no one bought it.I was practically promoting to the ladies there(even in the ladies' room),gave them a short brief on what i do.Even though they didnt buy it,it was great to see them showing some interest in my shirt and were kind enough to save my myspace link in their handphones.Of course not all showed interest.There were also a few who quickily said 'no thank you'.Ah well,it was worth it and i don't mind people saying no.Thats just how it is.We get a yes and a no,so its okay.=)I also did a custom t-shirt my boyfriend asked loooooonnng time ago.I finally got it done and gave it to him at the gig.Before his show started,he changed to that shirt and so it means,he freaking wore that shirt during his show!=))It made me happy to see him wear that shirt which was actually something i did spontaneously without designing it first.Well,i had something in my head.Thank god it tured out ok but a little messy.

I was also happy that i got the chance to be on stage and take pictures of his band playing.It was my first try taking photos of performances at gigs.Out of the whole bunch of pics i took,only few which i was satisfied with.heres some:

Okay,they're not that good but you know,first try.maybe my second would improve.= )Couple was the last band to perform if im not mistaken.I went back straight away after they performed as it was already 10 pm.Plus,I pictured angry faces of my parents at home waiting for me.I was supposed to go home at 5 pm.Yeahhh.5 hours late!yikes!
heres them if uve never heard of em:

alrite.toodles yaw.

I'M FRESH!

2008-02-21T07:27:00.000-08:00

Hey earthlings!Ive started fresh,finally!Please boys and girls,take a seat,relax your shoulders and shake off that curiosity .Ive finally made my decision after a few weeks of being seriously disturbed by my sinking business and the whole hole in my wallet thing. Allow me to represent to you:

S.K.I.P ART is my new art label.Im on my own now.I've got to tell you that i feel pretty darn good about this.Im slowly trying to develop my art into my interest as well as other's.What i've learned so far is,it has to work both ways.Agreement between myself and the public(what majority would want).What i do is basically anything that im capable to do with art which includes paintings,photography,drawings,scribbled arts on anything thats possible and what i've mentioned earlier,t-shirts which i do them handmade and printed.I also do custom t-shirts but custom shirts(only handmade) is still on the hang because i've ran out of money to buy the super duper expensive fabric dyes and pens.Meanwhile,some of my shirts and bags,yes bags*new* are at the printing shop now.I should be able to pick them up and sell by march.so stay tuned here=)

Here's one of my handmade shirts.(ladies')My first s.k.i.p art design.Its up for sale and its rm35.

ladies come on,buy one!
For orders or if you're not clear about s.k.i.p art,please do contact me via myspace which you can just click my link at my side bar.
Please,please tell your friends and everybody about s.k.i.p art.spread it please.= )
Thank you people.!
support me,our local bands and brands.Msia boleh!=p

today im a champion

2008-02-17T01:11:00.000-08:00

......because i had the guts to invite these to boys in,who crashed my home earlier today knowing that my parents would just appear at the doorstep anytime. Anyways,it wasn't that great actually as im feeling very feverish today.But still,all in all it was great hanging out with these two.my bf and his friend coppola.
some pics:

coppola's reall good at taking blur pictures im telling you; )ehehe

pelajar-pelajar drop-out sekolah menengah kebangsaan cicak kobain.

...and coppola just wears anything he founds at my house.first was the cowboy hat.then this

He also started to get high with my boyfriend,"mari kau,mari kau agagagagagagaga"

agggerrrrrrmuaahhh.dapat pon.awwwwwhhhh yearrghh

ahahaha!so that some some sneakpeak of just now.
till next time lah;)

so much for my obsession

2008-02-13T21:19:00.000-08:00

Well i just cant stop painting. I want it back. The passion thing. I mean i have it but its currently not coming out.aggghhh benci! I've tried sitting and getting ideas but its either nothing or crap. I was so down last night that i couldnt sleep ,had a big headache and sheded some tears. Yes..its this big of a disapointment to me. The bf told me i shouldnt paint when im like this. It should be when im ok and happy and all ready to paint with a big smile. I cant smile..I just hope it comes back..and happy valentines syg.Wish you're here= ((

Here's something i painted last night.but it lacks passion..I don't really 'feel' this painting.

acrylic on canvas size of 8x8 in.
Im putting it on sale.
tribute to nirvana gig at skizo studio,cheras.
1st march 08 at 1 pm onwards.

getting people to appreciate my art is as hard as getting people to appreciate me.
Im waiting for someone with experience/an art critic to come up to me,shake my hand and tell me ive done a great work.A great work.Out of my bunch of paintings,i'll still be on top of the world if only ONE of them got recognition.its tough..and everything seems cruel= ( I'll accept all the rejections..although its of a million..

stressed

2008-02-13T06:51:00.000-08:00

everything else but me is controlling me.They're eating me up.I need a break..What i want is not strong enough too come out. And i hate it..i need a break..i really need one..

im pathetic..

Too awesome to forget!!

2008-02-12T07:27:00.000-08:00

THIS is a video of last year's prom.Our prom rocked HARDER when these guys,rock n roll john, do their thang on stage.MAN!i want to go back to those moments!!!!!I feel the urge to PARTAY right now!danggggggggggggggggggggggg.Didnt i tell ya our prom was the best ever.

and heres a beautiful pic i found on ain's page of us beautiful,hot and wild ladies:

and if you love rnr john,view and add them at their band page:
www.myspace.com/rnrjohn

im telling ya,YOU SHOULD.;D

and oh,this!!!

29th march 08
annexe central market
rm13 per head
1pm till end

spread it!

Starting fresh

2008-02-11T03:31:00.000-08:00

Okay people,I've taken some time to think it through wisely about my lil t-shirt business. That was the problem of my insecurities lately and im revealing it now. Sorry to make some of you worried as i seem to have some moodie and emo moments.Especially to my bf, I apologize for any sudden over-reactions and the dont-feel-like-talking moments. Anyone thats into business, I'm telling (or warning) you,from my past experience that there is no playing around or the its-just-for-fun thingy when you're in a business. Make sure you do your homework well before starting anything alrite? If not, you'll end up like me-kusut tahap max,(insecure to the max) kekadang lapar sesangat(too hungry at times),kekadang kenyang la sgt(too full at times),kekadang tdo tak lena and mandi tak basah (slept not peacefully and bathed but not wet) and wasted alot of money as well as time. Haha sorry for the biligual thingy. Anyways,heres my real problem. I've done a few tees with stupid and ciplak (useless) fabric dye which made the colours to fade when washed. So 50% of my kusutness (insecurities) are caused by the guilty feelings that started to dwell in me eversince the complaints from my buyers came in. Another 20% was because of the new and actual fabric dye i found (that'll never fade) which costs so much that it choked me. It choked me and I almost cried like a baby. I HAD TO spent for some of the colours just to RE-DO the two t-shirts that my customers have ordered. So,yeah, its a total nightmare. Then,another 10% is because i had to cancel around 5 orders which before this I was really looking forward to do them. Since I cant do it,because the designs comsume a lot of colours and that as well means money, plus the new (and rather expensive) price i have to offer, I decided to stop doing handmade. Im thinking of doing printing from now on instead. So, I am going to start fresh by creating new designs as well as to start off again with printing but this is when the last 20% of my kusutness kicks in. I don't have the fucking money to fucking start fresh! As you can see (dnt bother the cursings) Its still a dilemma and im still freaking kusut. Dont bother me,i'll think once again. Meantime, heres my lil plan:

1. re-do the 2 tees
2. stick with selling paintings to get the money
3. get a name for my own clothing line (my own,not spinning jenny)
4. and lastly,do my fucking printed t shirts.(again,sry for the cursing)

Okay,yes, the third one. I know you're about to ask. The reason is, i don't feel like I'm in the team. I mean i don't feel like we're working together,as a team.It has always been an individual business anyway. So, why not just have my own but join them when we're involve in events.Im not 100% sure about this yet but...but....you know what, i have no final decision for ANY of theseeeee business thing yet. Yes,i'm still thinking.(pisses off) Updates later.ta.

p/s:Don't run or stop cheering (supporting) for me to go on top you cheerleaders (friends and others). Sorry for my crap.

i miss these guys.

2008-02-10T23:37:00.000-08:00

they've been missing!craig nicholls-my younger-days hero; )you still rock my world mate!

Of fats and fats and FATS

2008-02-09T20:23:00.000-08:00

life rate= 5/10

Alrite,i got few people coming up to me and ASKed me how i grew so fat. You should see their faces. They look disapointed as if its them whos grown fat. Yes,DISAPOINTED. I am not kidding, they even gave me this disbelieve look and sort of 'omg,you're A pig now!' look. Well, thanx guys and semi-congratulations,you brought down my life rate and if you succeed further, you'll probably bring down my weight too;D. Just let me tell you about myself first. I am....like a life version of a balloon. I inflate and deflate. Thats it. Enough said rite? I inflate AND deflate.I feel like a sumo wrestler now. I am going to exercise and diet at the same time. Kill me if you see me eating 'high calory foods' , Im giving you the permission to do so.Its just that guys, I inflate when i'am happy. Have you ever felt being happy, at all? Theres no borders, no bounderies. You'll do whatever you want and often subconciously. This is what happens. You binge and never felt any more beautiful. Well, until someone comes up to you and destroy your happiness by saying you're a fatty now. Don't get me wrong people, I thank you for telling me off. I aint want to grow fat. Its the thought of how to lose weight that brought me down and not what you people have said. Am i twisting you're minds? No,the last sentence was the real one. Scratch the top.;D

Jgn risau,aku exercise skang.ok?
Dont worry,ill exercise from now on.ok?
Damn, look how concerned you people are. How can i not love you guys!;p huggies! ( hug me now while im still very flashy;p )
take care kids.

Kusut serabai kepala otak

2008-02-07T09:57:00.000-08:00

Im very very kusut(insecure + big headache) right now. Just when i tot my life rate was at 9/10 it went down to 6/10 in just 5 hours. Sheesh. Ive been sitting here on my bed for hours figuring this thing out(some problem im not telling in here) and it fired me with a huge headache. I should learn how to handle problems better. I need to buy a self-help book. I am serious. But first I need to calm down, stop being anxious and start solving this stupid problem.

1. write down all the problems im facing on a piece of paper
2. Go to the bathroom and wash my face
3. Make a hot tea
4. Write down what i think i need to do in order to solve the problems

And I really should change my sleeping time. Its all wrong timing lately. I need new daily schedule. I should sleep at midnite and wake up at 6 am.Wow, I know. I'll turn into a perfectionist by year 2010. Geoff Thompson (an author ) had put a great impact on me. Im a neaty now and everythings practically in order. My room is no longer a mess, my books are arranged nicely at their racks and i tidy up my bed after I wake up. I couldn't help it but praise myself on this. I have no idea how i could actually keep up with keeping everything neat when before this i even had a rat died in my bedroom beneath my dirty clothes on the floor. I think it got lost in my room, couldn't pass through the mountain (pile of my dirty clothes), got fed up and died. Im not sure if it was suicide or suffocation. Poor rat.

Off.

Happy and Prosperous Chinese New Year everyone!

2008-02-06T20:16:00.000-08:00

You know, one of the things i love being in a multiracial country is that theres so many reasons to celebrate. We, have all kinds of celebrations and its great, its awesome when you think about it. The vibe is there, the happiness and love is in the air and smilling faces everywhere. Aint that just awesome? I love seeing people happy and i love being happy. Plus more public holidays for the kids and working people. Theres just one lil problem right now. I feel the urge to celebrate, to get out there and have fun with people and of course to get ang pau but im stuck here, at home. I dont know what to do or where to go. My chinese friend is only doing an open house in a weeks time. I feel like shopping. alone. But im here in Kajang and its too far or rather i feel too far to go to Kl. Normally from Setiawangsa, my apartment, its only like 5 minutes taking the lrt. I could go there back and forth anytime. OK, I know, I've complained too much.

Anyways, my life's at its peak rigt now. If I were to rate my life i'd give 9 out of ten. Thats how great my life is right now. Why not 10? Money. Money is a big problem. I am always broke that it scares the shit out of me. I'm sometimes depressed because of this. Whoever says money can't buy happiness, screw you. Money can freaking buy happiness. There should be no debate about this. I want money . I know, i know you people are screaming 'get ur ass to work!', or the less rude people would say,'kau keje ar dowh 'or the nicer ones would say, 'u should get a job,u know '.Thank you people but I am working,ok? I have a job. I make ts and paintings and other creative stuff. Its just that these things need a lot of investment. And Ive just invest a whole lot of money. To get that money back takes a lot of time. I mean A lot. I'll try not to think about it. But no one is stopping me from going shopping once i get the money. Delay all the outings! I need to shop! Sorry friends who were kind to ask me out for a drink, i seriously have no money and although actually i do have some, they're just not meant to be spent.
The 9 out of 10 includes happy being 18, done with highschool, an awesome relationship with the family,boyfriend and friends, more days to do whatever i want ,growing and inviting business and yeah,everything just seems great. Now this is the reason for my gained pounds.I binge like nobody's business these days and ive definitely grew fatter. This is what happens when ur life rate is 9/10.I need to sweat. I seriously need to s w e a t. GIG! I need to go to a gig. I gotta tell ya thats the best workout ever! Here's one im looking forward to:

HARMACY and MUCK are playing!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! They play good shows im not kidding.But,15 bucks.dayemmm.now its 50-50. Do you see what I mean? Happiness is taken away just like that because of 'kecek elek' (no cash).

Happy cny again!

im proud of myself; p

2008-02-02T20:20:00.000-08:00

Heres a customer of mine who made me proud. Thanks Lini, for the support. I appreciate it so much! I'll call u up if i need a model. muahs!;D

Special day over. Many Thanks:

2008-02-02T10:25:00.000-08:00

Thank you everyone for wishing me for my birthday.You people are the sweetest ever!It was a great 18th birtday i have to say.Felt awesome.Thanx mama n papa for bringing the big family together at cozy house at Great Eastern Mall, Ampang.Also for the delicious chocolate cake.Thanx Fairuz,my brother who wished me the first and at midnight sharp.Not only that, u even gave me two lovely picture frames.I love it. Abg Hafiz, though you couldn't get me the body shop lotion i wanted, u still gave me fifty bucks which was damn awesome of you.hehe. Aunty Yah, for the jean-type bag which i plan to use it for class.My other aunts and cousins who added to that fifty bucks, thank you also. To kak emi and abang Nizar, you guys have bought a present that i love so much. A photo album full of cats; p. You know how much I love cats but i cant help it that Im still a lil sad about the tragic and traumatizin death of my cat remang who was not only a cat but was actually my soulmate. Anyways, i don't plan to blog about her. Its too sad. Nufail,my 'twin' , thank you for the t shirt. Syg kamu. Iqin, fairuz's girlfriend who was very kind to give me a cheerful coloured card which made me all excited just by looking at it,thank you; D. It was a simple yet great birthday.

Whats more exciting is abg Nizar and Kak emi ordered two paintings sizes of an A3. Type of painting like i wanted selling at annexe. And Jim Flora's (an artist) style. Ive never done this type of painting but i did not say no.I will not say no. I will never say no. So, yes I am going to do it. No matter what. A cousin of mine also ordered a tshirt from me which is great. Adam, a friend i knew from myspace also ordered a shirt which i have to design for him. So hey, Im still in business ;D Then few hours ago I spent quite long being on the net just to find people who are doing art works or organizing events. I really need to broaden my 'horizon'. I need to spread my art. I really need to improve. So, i added a few just now and i found a new organizing team,bebas who was actually introduced by nufail. They're like rantai (another organizing team) but is newer and much more easier to approach compared to rantai who doesnt really reply my inquiries or wtv. So, thats alright and thankfully i found bebas. The better news is that they're still looking for a photographer to be in their team. So, without hesitant i offered myself. Showed them my work and they will consider it. They'll inform me if im in or not, soon.This is bebas:

check them out at www.myspace.com/bebasmusical

Back to last friday,I went to my apartment in ampang which is a concrete jungle which i dont really like staying in because im a nature freak. So, a home surrounded by buildings really gives me a headache. Everytime i go there i'll be homesick. I'll miss my whole-life-home here in Kajang where i have trees all around and a garden like a golfcourse with full of much fresher air. Anyways i went there in the morning and sat for 15 minutes,read the newspaper (yes,i read the newspaper;p) and was bored shitless later. So I went out to klcc on my own by the lrt which the station is only across the road from the apartment. Didnt feel like walking alone at klcc, unless i had the cash i wont mind shopping. alone . Since my pocket was empty, I textd shahrin (my boyfriend) to come hang out. Thankfully, he was free and came few minutes later. Well, Wangsa Maju isnt that far, so yeah. We walked around klcc up and down, round and round till we decided we could not do that anymore. So Shahrin had a great idea.We went in the Petronas Gallery to see some art.He finally knows what type of person I am; ). The amazing thing about this gallery is, it's free. F R E E. and i just got to know that! nampak sgt org tak appreciate art. And although its free, you dont see people in there! Anyways,i enjoyed it so much.

Thats it folks.goodnite.

The power of armpits

2008-01-31T10:33:00.000-08:00

Armpits are parts of our body that well,we are not fond of. So far I have not met anyone that loves their armpits more than they love their other parts of their body. But do you think armpits can be something that attracts the opposite sex? I don't mean like a real turn on or anything haha but it could be something, you know, like people do check out your armpits to judge you at some point. For an example, guys don't want girls who don't shave their armpits, do they? and ladies well,hairy armpits for guys are fine i think. I mean I won't fine them odd. Anyway there is a guy who said this in his profile on the 'who id like to meet' section: girls with nice armpits. Hahah!rock on, dude! Well, i guess it IS something that guys do look at.And I gotta tell you, razor blades are no longer good enough for perfect armpits these days. Thats why, whoever the geniuses are, came up with all sorts of inventions to remove body hair. If im not mistaken the latest is by using laser, innit? For common people like me, who doesnt have the extra cash just for the removal of armpit hair, we stick to razor blades or twizers(ouch). Or,avoid wearing sleeveless and keeping armpits down all the time.

Speaking of keeping armpits down, you know, if we're sweating do make sure that they're down!Because if our armpits are sweaty, they get really dominant. They'll start producing milky sweat which stinks and could really suffocate another person. Now, the reason i say this is because i was stuck in a bad situation-in an commuter packed with sweaty people. Being short as I am, I had 3 pukey armpits of different people right at my freaking face-In front, left, and right. The worst thing is I couldnt move and my stop was not any sooner. I was gasping for air, I needed oxygen very very badly and im not exaggerating. It was awful. Im not sure if they've heard of deodorant.I am going with heels of 3" everytime i get into a public transport with people from now on. At least theres 'less polluted' air on top.hah.

cheers people.

growing passion

2008-01-30T21:46:00.000-08:00

It is time that i stand my ground. I am going to say it loud and clear without a single doubt or fear (wow,it rymes,now where did that come from):

' I have passion in art and my passion lies deep within. I am not an artist by profession but i know there is an artist in me. People are always full of doubts and they are always (most of them) very negative on thoughts or ideas or some creation by other people. People tend to have this narrow minded thinking or mentality of bringing people down instead of being humble and helping people to the top. It saddens me, but that is how most people are. Thus, with myself experiencing and encountering a lot of these negativeness from people around me, bringing me down and making me to even have a thought of giving up, I would just like to now stand firm and say 'you failed'. You almost burry me under the ground but the sun has shone once again.ok,whatever that means. What im trying to say is, I'm not a chicken anymore nor am I a sheep. Im a lion that roars. I am no longer hesitant of showing my work to people and Im not scared of making mistakes anymore. I believe and Im sure everyone does, that art is very subjective. Everyone knows that art is subjective so why do they still critisize just to bring people down. Such an irony, I have to say. I will now accept all sorts of criticism from people with an open heart. Ill take whatever there is that I need to go on top, consider others twice and leave whats not necessary. Its no doubt that it is the one way to improve, innit?. Last but not least, I feel sorry for people who tried,try or are trying to bring me or other people down. I feel sorry that you can't actually do what we positive people are doing. And I feel sorry that you can't step out from your 'comfort zone'. Thank you. Rest assured '

Now,these are my latest,biggest and best work so far.stare at it as long as you can.you might get my message.

This piece is called ' faith muse and courage '. It represents what i have said ealier. But let me just explain in detail. I have painted this when i got the inspiration to change. So, this piece really means a lot to me basically because it is the first piece i've done that has a true meaning and represents me. The new me. When i was painting this I made a decision. I will not allow anyone to bring me down. Just like what i've said earlier. I now have faith,muse(inspiration) and courage. ' Faith ' is represented by the colour light blue. Its a soft colour which means it is firm and will always be there.Its okay if people don't have faith in us but it's important that we have faith in ourselves. For ' courage ', I used red to represent it as courage needs to be strong and on-going. Courage always comes with fear.Thus there is still 'fear' in this painting (represented by the black paint).This is because,there is still fear in me.But the fear will only be the shadows of the courage.Shadows.They follow but they dont lead.Courage leads. The rest of the colours in this painting represents muse or inspiration. There are many colours for it because muse is everywhere.Its scattered and of all sorts.Okay.tell me what you think;D

Now, this painting is for me being a loyal fan of Kurt don cobain for almost five years already. In this painting it shows my view on his life. It was full of depressing and unbearable moments, preassures from surrounding but yet, a true soul living in him.Cobain,his guitar,art and music are the things that actually made him happy, that made him HIM. He has his own beautiful world and he is a man full of originality.And i admire him for that.The painting shows towards the end of his life where i drew a gun and lots of red paint which symbolises blood spilling.It shows that he could not stand the media pressures anymore, at that time as well as being eaten up from the inside due to drug addiction.Its really sad but he will always be remembered.And i know this for sure.There.*wipes tears.

Okie dookie,you are free to judge now;D.

WISHLIST!

2008-01-30T18:42:00.000-08:00

Well, well, my birthday is in two days time. Just wanna let the WHOLE WORLD knows that im turning 18 in 2 d a y s t i m e
!.sweet sweet 18.Oh,and you know what,i would REALLY appreciate it if you people would buy any OR all of these for my birthday:i know u nice people just cant wait to get me presents but heck, just dnt know what to get me rite? kick off the sighs,i made it easier by doing you this list.

1. It'll be very nice if you people would buy me A PAINTING from the first shop on the left as you enter annexe central market.

2. If thats gnna make a big whole in your wallet, as the canvas + the oil paint + the intelligent talent of the artist would sum up to big amount of cash, getting me ACRYLIC PAINTS are good enough.

3. Though if you really love me and dont mind spending,you can always get me a FILE for my portfolio which I saw at kinokuniya (at the stationary section, just walk straight to the back).It costs RM118.not too bad ey?

4. No worries if you dont love me THAT much (haha;p), buy me CANVAS.big or small doesnt matter. BIgger are always better. you know that rite? i know im right.

5. BRUSHEs or black FABRIC PENs will be f i n e..............

6. OH oh!how bout a new BLACK EYELINER.the one that doesnt smear easily.yg mahal tu.(hahahah;p).it'll be great for my sepet eyes. and i always get it tattooed so i promise you it wont be a waste. at all. at all.

7. If you like NOVELs,i like em too.but make sure its not the typical teen novel ok? coz im not one hahah.i mean the 'late teen' novels are fine. Adult fiction.you know what i mean.*gelak nakal (cheeky laugh).

8. You know what,i really r e a l l y need a new chair for my study section in my room. The MODERN STYLE STOOL which is best if the height can be adjusted. And and,i wud like bright colours for it. Green, red, or white. You know, the 'ikea' colours. oh ya,get it from ikea, hows that?

9. I would also really love to use some of BODYSHOP'S BODY LOTION.yea,i'd really love that.make sure its sweet smelling,not too mile not too strong. Find the smell that says, "im 18,im new,clean,legal and fresh.come to me,im here ooh baby ooh baby." haha. Thats too much. How bout just this, " im 18,im new,clean,legal and fresh" ok fullstop. Find me that.

10. last but not least...bring KURT COBAIN to life?i'd love a one night stand with him.

Okay,your pick guys. But i know you people are a bunch of cheapskates. And i know im not AT ALL mean. just throw me a pool party.haha kidding,just make sure you wish me ON my birthday.midnite will be best.;p take care 'kids'. wehehe

bla-de-bla

2008-01-10T18:49:00.000-08:00

net not working.things are goin OK..
Though i really miss studying.haha.yeah.
cant wait to get into college or u and get bz.
plus i ran out of friends.yeah friends.ill tell you what people run out of.peop run out of cash or fuel.not friends.but me?my friends are mostly gone.dissapeared.poof!just like that.hanged with az last few days which was fun.been a while since we last hanged.thank you monkey for coming.Though he was late but i didnt really mind bacause i was hooked by this great book by geoffthompson at kinokuniya.'the art of thinking positive'.uhuh,the perfecto book for me.Ended up buying it.lol
aite,have to go.

new event!

2008-01-01T03:04:00.000-08:00

hope sempat la buat my ts.3 days left.no sleep; /

goodbye 07

2007-12-31T10:27:00.000-08:00

07 was one of the best years in my life.seriously ,it was the ultimate teen life.well,somehow.it was great without putting spm aside.spm was an experience.I mean,u only sit for one spm in your life and it was surely something i wanted to go through.Though it wasnt great but after it has ended there was a great feeling.Partly because it was a relief,of course but it was also because well somehow i felt proud of myself.Not that i did well but simply because i sat for it till the end.gah,u get what i mean rite.i love ups as well as the downs.makes me appreciate life more.

I just got back from morooco.Trip to Morocco was another great great experience.The food,people,surroundings,basically everything is different from the typical life we live in or even the british or australian.If u've been to a poor country,u might get what i mean.But what i like about morocco is,although the people are poor,they have this amazing culture which they nurture and just keeping them alive.They have their own style of living and the things they make.90% of their stuffs are handmade.its just amazing.If you dont appreciate art,culture or if ur not adventurous,dont go morocco.Its a waste.If u love lamb,they have the best lamb in the world.U can never get it anywhere else.Tagine is one of their local dishes.They have tasty tagine lamb up in the mountains.Thats like the original tagine.The ones you find in restaurants arnt that nice.they also have 'cous cous',their local dish as well.its wheat,they eat em everyday just like how we eat rice.not too bad.it goes with the chicken.sort of like nasi briyani except that the cous cous make it taste different.But again,if ur not the adventourous type,like my brother we call him hero kampung,because he cant eat those stuff at all.he wouldnt.Well it was great.the weather was good.sunny.very cold.didnt rain at all when we were there.there was one night which we had to watch a cultural show outside,at night.8 degrees.can u imagine.and it was a long show.everyone was numb by the end of the show.lol.Even Hassan,our driver got a headache because of that.hes a local!whos the tourist now?haha.and we got snow up in the mountains.lucky us.well,overall,it was a great trip.though the transit and flight was hell.

On 07 too,i found someone new.Im with shahrin now.Hes a great guy.No one really cared bout me like he does and i feel very comfortable hanging out with him.nk sepak pon sepak je.sekeh pon sekeh lah.well,at first i didnt think my feelings for him would grow.i thought u know,ive liked other people too.but somehow i feel he can take care of me very well.just hope everything runs smoothly this time.i hope things dont change for the worse and i like the way it is now.i hope he understands me well and doesnt change.im happy and i like him now like how i first met him.I feel secure with him.one thing bout him,he knows how to do that.hai org tua,i love u.trima kasih banyak,buat aku gembira.; )

2008.a new year.who knows what comes next.just chill,wait and see.till next time.happy new year all!

this year is D year!

2007-12-16T17:01:00.000-08:00

Prom was AWESOME!its more than awesome i couldnt even explain how awesome it was.omg!!to those who didnt come,u guys missed a huge thing here.rnr john,u guys made it happen man.and of course dj shashi,ur the best dude.with ur lightings and the music.dayem!!it felt like we were in zouk man.Really didnt want it to end.kongy made prom queen(as expected)hahah.and lester made prom king,also,as expected.it was fun man.danced and danced headbanged and headbangd jumped and jumped.gah,i feel like turning back time to that night once again.

n oh,they called me lingerie model.because my dress was like a lingerie,duh and its see through.hahah.yeah was i crazy or wat!no wonder boys were hitting on me.winks/

prom pics not done.

rantai art event was....okla.though i didnt manage to sell my shirts.but,i still got 6 orders for some of my designs,which i really have to do soon.im happy with that for a start.im in for some money.im broke.

off to morocco this wenesday.YIPPY!!!!bye2 malaysia.will be back new years eve.cant wait to take good photos.

schedule

2007-12-12T21:39:00.000-08:00

8.00pm – Entrance to Perdana Ballroom [Food is ready to be served]

8.15pm – Band I(the melodies)

Song One :

Song Two :

Song Three :

song four :

8.45pm – Waltz

9.15pm - Band II [5 songs](couple)
1. tentang kita
2. gotta be my gurl
3.rock n roll
4.now that i can see
5. love you yes

9.45pm – Band III [4 songs](rnr john)

song 1:johnny b. good

song 2:bob joe

song 3:tuti fruti

song 4:marilyn

10.00pm – Prom King and Queen announcement

10.15pm – Slow dancing

10.30pm – DJ

11.00pm – Food can be cleared off

1.00 am – Event ends

[the melodies are doing 2 beatles cover]

oh

2007-12-12T09:31:00.000-08:00

its 2.55 am on a thursday which means prom is tomorrow.oh my god.Well everythings almost settled.Whats left is for me to print out 5 copies of the schedule for the comittee members.Text acap again bout the extra equipments which i really hope i can get so that the sound system can be improved.And of course,be at the hotel by 9 am tomorrow as promised to lee lian the bosh.I have to get to work immediately.First thing is to set up my drums then ill move on to helping shashi with the amps and stuff.I hope that it can be settled by noon.I'll have my break and the bands will start coming for soundchecks after friday prayers which is around 2.30 pm.i hope everything goes smoothly.

schedule:

9.00 am -set up of the equipments
12.00pm -break
2.30 pm -soundcheck(the melodies)
3.30 pm -soundcheck(rnr john)
6.30 pm -soundcheck(couple)
7.00 pm -get ready!

ill be wearing a black dress,very short,yes quite sexy indeed.It was not my intention to reveal much of my skin but i was too lazy to search for another dress.I got this dress unintentionally last few months when i was walking around with my friend at a mall in kajang.It costs me 70 bucks.Well,reasonable i guess for a simple yet 'sweet' dress.Not an ordinary prom dress i shall say.Its more of a party dress.Ah well,i think it suites me well though.I think im happy that i bought it.Just one problem though.stomach can be seen as it is a lil body hugging.Ive been doing seat ups for the past month but ya know,didnt get the abs shakira,j lo or beyonce have.god i love their abs.But im happy that my waistline got smaller eversince and a lil less fat around my belly.I guess i wont be eating tomorrow.Heh,yes i would do that.

I asked this one guy to be my date if he ever comes to my prom.i mean i textd him,of course.Yesterday he said he'll come if he has the money.but when i texd him today saying if he comes to prom alone,be my date,i didnt receive any reply.So its either hes out of credit or that simply means no.Ahh well,i was turned down i guess.Its not that i mind so much but it'll be nice to have a date,i thought.Better yet with a good looking guy.well,'boleh tahan' la.heheh.

Az decided to come to my prom after god knows how many times he changed his mind about this and i wont be surprise if he decided not to go at the very last minute.Well,its all up to him though.

I cant wait to see all the gorgeous people and just jumping,headbanging and dancing to some awesome music with awesomest friends and not to mention,its parent-free.Its what every 17 year olds should experience at this time of their lives.Another thing a 17 year old should experience is to not go home for at least a day.Thats right.I wont be going home after prom and i have no idea where ill be sleeping.I told my mum ill be sleeping at a friends house.But ya know,i dont think so.I planned to hang out all night with friends.And i guess i'll sleep wherever.Will be going straight for rantai the nxt morning.xmandi.heh.!

Well,ill just see how it goes then..im off to get some sleep.goodnite.

high school graduation

2007-12-11T00:27:00.000-08:00

Graduation was a blast last nite!It was awesome.Only 4 teachers turned up and not many of the form 5s turned up anyway.so like half of the crowd was our friends(the bands n their crews),hijau to be more precise.It was great ya know.though the sound system was not that good and most of the kids didnt enjoy the performances.haha,they were dead!i ENJOYED them.i was jumping around like mad.man i love live shows.cant wait for prom.

The evening started off with pelat,hijau's vox singing two of his songs.solo,just something while waiting for other bands to come.The Dearly missed played second.The vox is cute.haha and his voice isnt that bad.good performace.they were great.sang 5 songs i think.sara was drooling over him and not to mention my camera was full of his pics.Then Oh chentaku performed.they were great too.the drummer is hebat.but then,im not really a fan of theirs but i still headbanged to their songs though.hahah.Last band to perform was hijau.cooled down a lil with their indie.I was already tired by that time too.haha.they were all awesome.and thanx to hijau and their crew for staying back and help me load my drumset back in the car.couldnt do it without you boys.And yesterday was also the first time i met am= ),the guy who asked me to join his band dulu.not bad looking and baik .oh cawand,robot and kayrel,nice meeting u guys too.

next event will be prom and rantai.This weekend will be packed.i cant wait!ill be going solo for prom.time for an eye candy and hooking up with someone hot.hahah;)cheers

out again

2007-12-05T05:51:00.000-08:00

this time with fye,capik,acap and neb.lepak2lah lepeh spm nih.and kire celebrate baday fye skali lah.omg.been so long since last lepak with capik.haha sonok gk td.

future dilemma

2007-12-03T06:06:00.000-08:00

Tomorrow will be the last day before my high school year ends.It'll be my last 1h 15 minutes sitting in class and doing a high school examination paper.My art paper.yes.Finally.People keep asking me what i want to be when i grow up.To tell the truth I dont know what I wanna be.I mean,for a living.To actually do it for the rest of my life and earning enough.What i normally tell them is i want to be a journalist.Well,sure it is something that im interested in but then again,not entirely.My passion and interest still lies in art.Though,i would really love to try out journalism,doing some writting and stuff.My English isnt good enough but I know i can work it out.My dad already has plans for me.Im taking an english short course next year to futher improve in it as well as to get a certificate so that itll be much easier for me later on to get into uni.Im also going to take a short photography course.Basically im just going to try to improve in everything which i have interest in.And what comes later on is another thing.If possible i would like to get into uitm taking mass communication.But im not confident of getting into uitm since i have no idea what ill get for my spm and quite a big number of students are into mass com.loads of competetion here.So,most probably,as it seems,my parents are going to put me into taylors college.But i really really hope that i'll get uitm coz you know,i dont have to use up alot of my dad's money.College will definitely be expensive.
hah,bingung juga kepala aku pikir pasal bende nih.I dont know if i can enjoy right now.Im pretty worried bout these stuff.I dont know what im gonna be in 6 years.Im worried bout my results.I dont think i did well enough.ape nak jadi ngan aku!!

out

2007-11-29T04:49:00.000-08:00

Went out today with sara and neb to get our tshirts kosong utk rantai nnti.spinning jenny dapat booth on 15 and 16 dec.alhamdulillah ada rezeki;p.ada rezeki but at the same time buat aku pokai.harini je dah guna 70 bucks.and i still owe 35 bucks.gah dammit.byk betui gna duit bende nih.lagi2 spinning jenny just 3 orang.Booth ja da 60 bucks.so split pon,sorang 20 bucks.haih,mahal2.anyway,did i tell you today was fun?well it was.havent hang out for pretty long.so berbaloi juga lah tgu bas berjam nk sampai.nak balik pong terpaksa diri lama dengan jamnya lagi dgn org tolak menolak.Oh,speaking of org tolak menolak,most people really dnt have the courtesy to even say 'excuse me'.i mean how hard is that?pft bodoh punya olang!Anyways,we manage to reach annexe and got our t shirs kosong.unfortunately we got only whites.We wanted sort of vintage colours but the shop attendant tu kata wont be able to get easily.plus because we need em quick.so white it is.Now i have to do 7 designs and i havent start with any.gah.ill be 'bz'.hahah.i really need ilham man.mintak2 jadilah my designs.amin.

Minggu lepeh lagi da ajak2 shahrin mai lepak annexe today.he said he wont be coming back.tiba2 smlm rabu msg kata xde class and da balik.so i ajak him lepak and he said segan because my friends will be there.haishh hang nih mmg nak kena.paksa jugak dia datang tadi so he did come.heheh.setelah lama xbertemu ngan dia dapat la jgk jmpe tadi.lepas rindu kat hang.and bumped into jay.amik gmbar semua.biasala..dengan org fames.xlepeh peluang kan.haha.heres the pics.

oh the third picture is pakcik jual t yg baik hati.heheh.the last pic,i look like an old woman.pfft.nice pic anyway coz its very clear,sarah tangkap.; )shahrin bersabarlah.sara mmg suka buli orang.tapi baguih la.hang slalu buli aku.padan muka.haha.
hah well its a very tiring day sbb tgu bas lama tu and jalan jauh.plus i didnt eat today.only ate 3 kaya balls for breakfast.hahah,but then again,it was fun.cheers

alone

2007-11-28T09:07:00.000-08:00

damn..kindda lonely tonight.=(
i should get use to this.

so i shoot myself to kill time.still felt lonely after that.and not to mention took so many shots and im only satisfied with this.thats why i hate shooting self portraits.im just not for it.

aku kesunyian.i admit.how do u sigletons do it.

AKTA ANGKASA

2007-11-27T02:47:00.001-08:00

I FREAKING FELL IN LOVE WITH THEM.SUCH AWESOME BAND EXIST!
I SWEAR TO GOD I LOVE THEM TO THE CORE.
i LOVE them.

I wont stop saying this.again,i LOVE them.
They're just simple AWESOME.

local bands that i DEFINITELY support:
-mercy mercy
-akta angkasa
-jeorpardice
-teenage glory for the wasted
-telephony delivery.

U GUYS are AWESOME.

great day

2007-11-24T08:05:00.000-08:00

we got the keys to our new condo in kl.Sri Maya.nice condo.We're gna stay there maybe for a month or so next year and gna rent it out after that.Well,17 taun duk kajang nk merasa jugak duk kl kn.hehheh.senang sket nak kuar rayau2.train station is just across the road.

omg,is that a 50 year old guy on that thing??
ahhh...Nope.he's 53.and hes my dad alrite.!hahha.mmg macam budak kecik!;p.i looovee uuu!

naik gila aku naik bnde ni ngan dia.lol

mama pon tak tau mana nk hide malu.hahah;p.

I cant wait for our unit to be furnished.looks like we have to shop for some furnitures soon.So,later we went bukit bintang.law yatt to get.ehem this baby:

hahah yes,finaly.And then we went back n out again for dinner at novatel.My bro hafiz came from damansara.Dinner with the family.5 of us.love that.food was good.
bottom line,today was a family day out and it was great.;)

fuck all perverts!

2007-11-23T03:32:00.001-08:00

IDIOTS!such losers.

spinning liyana

2007-11-22T06:15:00.000-08:00

My heads spinning.Im more confused than ever.So confused that i don't even want to think about it.Why do things get so complicated at times.Im liyana.the happy jumpy kid.the happiest girl in the universe.Well,so it seemed.Ignorance is bliss but i dnt know how to ignore things.And its bothering me and i dont like it.im having mixed emotions here.I WANT TO BE OUT OF THE COUNTRY!away from people for a while.bdw do you know what love is?oh yes i do.ive been in love once.whats the feeling like?it was awesome.i couldnt sleep and when i do all i dream is that one person.and makan x kenyang mandi xbasah.It makes me happy that i can even shed a tear.it makes me float and i felt like i have wings to fly.it was so beautiful that even the cheesy love lines doesnt seem pathetic but seemed so true.That was with my first boyfriend and the love didnt last in me bacause he was over protective which shoved me away.too loving that he was obsessed with me.too obsessed that he was always emotional even on little things that got in our way.He was often sick and he needed me 24/7.I really mean 24/7.i felt like his mother more than his girlfriend.he needed my comfort too much that i couldnt give it anymore.I felt like a boyfriend,giving all those care and comfort while i dnt get much.What i got is not being able to talk to other people.He was too afraid that they would fall for me.too afraid too lose me.That is an obsession.I am obsessed with kurt don cobain.people get obsessed with their idols but not their partners.It felt like my world was in his hands.He was too crazy over me that i even thought he needed theraphy.Because he couldnt do it,couldnt live even when im busy for a while.i loved him but thats not how it should be.thinking of him makes me crazy.i couldnt bear that kind of life.n so i broke up.It was other way round with azzari.Totally opposite.the 24/7 text messeges with my first boyfriend came down to 2-3 messeges a week with my new boyfriend.It felt different especially after two and a half years with the first one.after 2 n a half years being so used to every-minute messeges.It was a big change for me.totally a big change.everything else was different too.Although i can count how many times i went out with my first boyfriend(meaning we didnt go out much),i still was so very deep in love with him.I dnt see why it couldnt work with az.but it really couldnt and didnt.Maybe were're not meant for each other?As much as it hurts,i accept it.i gave up and accept it.reconcile?ive thought about it.but i dnt think im going for it.i dnt want to be asked for outings and cant make it.i dnt want to be unavailable to him as a gf.i dont want to dissapoint him.Thats whats hard for me.And so i guess my decision is final.yes.only now.I think its best this way.

CRAP!another personal entry.

die! die!

2007-11-20T01:02:00.000-08:00

addmaths was a BITCH!

gah.sian kn?xpasai ja kene pgl bitch.sapa suruh xblajak awai2 kan?.sian addmaths,sian aku.since ini kali terakhir aku negok kau dan jawab soalan2 kau,aku ucapkan slamat tinggal,addmaths.Aku harap aku xbertemu dgn kau lagi pada masa hadapan.bertemu dengan saudara kau moden maths tak apa.tapi dgn kau,tolongla tglkan aku.Maaflah sebab terlalu banyak aku mencarut kat kau dan pgl kau assmaths.mana tak fail kan?haih.selamat tgl.

introducing:

2007-11-16T00:28:00.000-08:00

coming soon.
muahahah!*evol laugh*

hiihhi;p hah,life is treating me god damn good!and also,great plans ahead.Well,enough with boyfriends and all that."i dnt need a man"lol.its just that im doing a major on myself now.soon i mean.new time,this time 'SELF DISCOVERY'time.yes,it has come.time for me to 'berkembang' since Im gnna be 18 in 3 n a half months time.i have to make a great history here.not for anyone else's sake but for my own.and anyone care enough to throw me a party next year?hihi.bdw,ive been telling too many personal things here.ill take a break frm that.well,since there is nothing personal to talk about.heh;D

oh about the 'spinning jenny' thingy,well....coming soon=)

keeping fingers crossed

2007-11-15T03:11:00.000-08:00

I hope ill get to display (and sell,if anyone wud wanna buy) my art stuff at RANtAi's art event on the 16th of dec.Still waiting for the confirmation from this new friend i made(hahah,on myspace;p) who was really kind enough to offer me a space to display my artwork.By that he means joining him and his band (matematik) if they get a table.If they dont,he still will help me find a table from his friends.Well,i jus need a LIL space anyway: )

His band,matematik will be performing there on the 16th alongside couple and..and many other bands.heheh.
well since his helpful i should probably promote his band.listen to their songs at:

amp.channelv.com/matematikmusik

and their band page:

www.myspace.com/matematikmusik

hiihi.cheers

no more lyana-azzari

2007-11-14T21:05:00.000-08:00

Well,it was mutual.BOth of us felt strange as a couple.i told in my previous entries that i was not ready to give up on him but just about a week ago,i did.i actually did gave up.And luckily he felt the same,and we talked just about a few minutes ago.so we are singletons from today onwards.My feelings?idk.I think its better this way.Because theres absolutely no north-south magnet between us.And i absolutely dnt mind being single.infact i havent been single for almost 3 years!ive been with my ex for 2 and a half years,broke up and got together with az 5 days later till today.well,3 months of nuthing with him.i mean as a couple.but friends,yea it was something.Didnt regret anything though.I am going to be single for as long as i can.Although theres someone whos been waiting for me,i dnt want to be in a realtionship right now.Unless its the guy that ive liked since i was 12.6 years.wayyy before my ex even.man,hes the only guy ive really liked.too long i have to say.never got the chance to even talk to him though.But i hope someday i will.and someday,he'll know.perhaps;/

The Brothers

2007-11-12T06:27:00.000-08:00

one of the most disgusting man alive;my brother.yet,its wat makes him unique and explains why people love him.hes entertaining.i mean,VERY.Will be dead without him.he also has this idk,this thing with old people.Soft hearted i have to say.Aunties and grandma LOVES him.No,im really serious.yes,i dnt say this often and ill only say it once.enough praising.i love u brother.

HAPPY 22nd(i think,haha)BIRTHDAY IN ADVANCED.

HAPPY BELATED 26th BIRTHDAY ABG HAFIZ.
ur bossy,but i love you too:)

one last time

2007-11-10T09:59:00.000-08:00

Lord,God,Allah,

im praying for u,begging you, for one little thing for now.Please,please and please,keep my mind steady,relaxed as it can be,all the notes and everything ive learned thsts in my head to be 'queing' patiently and 'comes out' only when i need em,get back in line when i dont need em,dnt let em run around like crazy pigs in my head.it'll make things harder,giving me a headache,and'll leave me blank.You see,no one wants that.i certainly dnt want that.Ya Allah,let the ideas flow in and out smoothly.ones out make sure theres enough time for me to jod em down and not just flow in the air and blown far away by the wind.Once back in make sure they're back 'in line','queing' for their turn if ever i need em once again for another point.Ya tuhan,please let my hands be calm and not shaking.Let me write with the best writting.As clear as i could so that it will set a pleasant mood for the examinor to read.Most gracious,please let my eyes be wide open,see things clearly.Let me read every word there is in the question papers with my brains working well at the same time.Bring me memories and ideas.make them come to life while i answer every single question.Let me question myself and answering the questions right away.Let it be right.Let it be right,i beg u.Most merciful,let my heart beat as steady as it could.Bring me far away from getting a nervous break down.Im ready to use the brains u gave me.Dnt let me panic.Im worried because im certainly not worried at all right now as if im sitting for a normal test.So please,i dnt want to panic once in the hall.please!

amin.

spm

2007-11-10T00:47:00.000-08:00

its this monday.12th nov 07.ready or not,time wont wait.it has come and i have to sit for it.ill be writting down everything and anything i know for the last time of my high school history.everything and every single thing that i can remember from what ive learnt all these years.Panic,is the one thing that im worried of.What makes me panic?The thought of getting the results next year,yes,and also for not being fully prepared.Why am i not fully prepared?The thought of the joy ill be getting after finishin/semi-finish the papers.Why am i so stupid?I have no idea.I dnt dare to say i dread this spm because therell only be one spm and one chance in my life.yeah,again,THIS is it.It feels like im in my subconcious state untill now.2 days before spm.What is hapenin with me?i absofuckinlutely have no idea.People,i myself wish myself the best of luck all the time.Its not possible to not think about spm at his moment.Just yesterday i was still having fun and fooling around,had a wonderful night with the family.U must be wondering,am i kidding myself.Someone even labelled me as 'hero' for still being online and not studying.Well,i thank you.But,its not that i dont study at all.i do,to be honest.Maybe just not much or enough to score a string of straight A's.I have my target but maybe just not very ambitious,well at this moment.where im actually supposed to be all out and going for it.throw all that force and effort.score straight A's.okay maybe 10 As and fail for chemistry.coz thats the only subject i cant do at all.absolutely no chemistry with chemistry.But if i studied well enough i know i could get 10As.For now,2 As down.And its all still hope.HOPE.8 As is not easy but no harm trying all my best.Gah,i dnt know what i'll get!!ahh,crap.But i promise myself not to regret anything.anything at all.so,wish me all the best or just shup up.Im not being mean,but if you're gnna say something,i know whats its gnna be so id rather not hear em over and over again.i know.have u heard of the saying 'its easier said than done'?Thats what im facing and im sure everyone faces that but my weakness is failing to break that.I shall not go on with this now.wish me luck.: )

hanged

2007-11-07T10:12:00.000-08:00

a bit of poster colour n the rest water colour.
= )

Annexe rocks my socks!

2007-11-06T18:03:00.000-08:00

im in love with annexe.Thats the best place on earth!i love the people and mostly the art there.Its awesome man.awesome!
So,i dropped by the other day just to check out the gallery.its nice ya know.lots of people.very cool.

Phew!one day,next year im gonna open my own gallery there!hahah for the sake of nuthin-to-do-after-spm.; )
Anyways!no one bought my prints:

BUT
BUT
BUT!!
This baby:

WAS SOLD FOR RM 30!
and according to jeany they were even fighting for it.whow!didnt expect that.So,sgtlah berbaloi what i did.
and..im doing this now.i mean selling my art.This abstract lomo can be ordered with band names of your choice.and of course the abstract will be different.I already have one client now.winks*and still selling for rm30.Rm 40 if its on canvas and using aqrilic.
my other art stuff for sale:

rm 30

rm 35

rm35

Ohkay.thats all for now.bdw,my prints are still available.rm 25 each.wish me luck people.!; )

ferck

2007-11-03T03:03:00.000-07:00

My internet xberfungsi.dammit.im using my cousins now.lots of update about the annexe thingy but i cant type it out now.so,stay with me.Just to tell yea first that i made a few changes on the art work from my previous entry and also displayed 4 of my photography work there.Ill update when i get my internet back.so,do come back=)
ta!

My first art work to be displayed in public.

2007-10-29T22:16:00.000-07:00

Well,i sure hope so.
My cousin Jeany,textd me yesterday saying shes doing an art auction at ANNEXE (WOWW!) this sat and sun.She asked me if theres any of my work that i would want to sell or display.I was SO thrilled.I mean ive always wanted THIS.This is it.The first step.And i dont know how she knows im an art person cause im really not close to her.anyways,god bless u so much sis jeany!But one problem though.I didnt know what to give her.All my work are just plain sketches and regular paintings on an art block.I dnt think that'll be good enough to be displayed let alone sell.So,I HAD to do something.BUT,im not sure if its good enough but i like it and im gnna give it a try.I don't mind if no one buys it.As long as its shown to the public,that'll already make me happy.;D

Introducing my (unfinished) work.

Okay,hahah,that is the only thing i could think of and capable of doing in the meantime.This is an abstract lomo with band names on it.Its about 20cm by 54 cm.Not too big or too small.Just nice i thought.The reason why i chose to do this is because I think that well,its more for youngsters actually and hopefully it COULD BE something that they would want to hang on their walls.yes,dream on.;p Its not fully completed.I have to paste them nicely on a cardboard and make a frame.yes,a wooden frame and paint it white or mustard(haven't decide).From tomorrow i have to search for wood.

The end result,i'll blog it another time once finish.Im excited but at the same time,not so sure if its ok to be displayed.
till next time.ta

guilty.

2007-10-27T23:00:00.001-07:00

If theres a judge,i would be behind bars already and i would gladly accept it.

reasons:
1.for not attending alif's open house yesterday
2.for not being able to go to my bf's friend's opn house today.

From reason 1:
no transport.
Basically everyone that can drive were all out yesterday and i was left home alone.I felt very very guilty for not being able to be there especially because he came my house to invite me.I text him later that evening to say how much im sorry.He said its alright and we could catch up some other time.Then a bit later a new msg from him came in,"you know my house is still open and i can pick u up there if u want"gah,he was late!! i was already on my way out to have dinner with the family.Damn i didn't know that hes house will be open till night.So yeah,xde rezeki.

From reason 2:
Lini,az's friend invited me to her open house later at 3 pm.Again,no transport.My dad is out riding and my brothers out for raya.My mum is home but she cant send me there.Its bangi and we have to look for her house.WIth my mum's terrible sense of direction,we wont make it.Or even if we will,she won't be able to make it home after she drops me off.sigh.I feel terrible because az has always been there with me when i asks him to come along.He has met almost all of my friends.I havent met any of his except for petch.Hah,i really have to make it up to him some day.

From both reasons:
I NEED MY LICENCE!

people do come back. .

2007-10-25T05:53:00.000-07:00

My mom screamed my name just this evening when i was resting peacefully in my bedroom.I was purging badly from 3 am last night.god knows what I ate.Anyways,i managed to get my fat ass up from bed right after she called.She told me my friend Alif was here,at my house.But i didn't quite hear what she said at first.Was it Alif or Ariff and here as in my house or on the phone.So I checked with her again and she said Alif's at the gate.I stopped and stared at her for a second.You gotta be kidding me i thought.I still could not believe what i heard.Maybe she heard it wrong.Maybe it was Ariff and not Alif.Alif is an old friend of mine.My ex's close friend actually,who changed school from saujana to victoria Institution in Kl last 2 years and never got the chance to keep in touch him ever since.He was very close to my ex before.Even went to Hong Kong together with my ex's family.And not to mention,was with us on our first date.Note that our first date was also the first time we've met.So,I went out to the gate and could not belive my eyes.IT WAS HIM! A L I F.I went 'oh my god' for like a minute in front of him and shaked his hands a lil too long.I missed him!we werent close(I believe its because my ex bf never liked me talking to other guys especially his friends) but Alif,he was everyones little brother.He has this cute character which everyone loves.And i can't believe how much i miss him.He was there!at my house and in front of me!He looked the same,and still has that kiddish character.And so I invited him in but he said he cant be long,his sister was in the car.He just stopped by to invite me to his open house this saturday.How thoughtful of him.I didn't think that he'll even remember me.The one question did pop though."how are u with ridt,still ok?"So,i guess he hasnt been catching up with him either.but he leaves just opposite of ridt's crib.hmm got me thinkin there.Anyways,i told him that im no longer with ridt and back to the invitation,i said i'll try to make it.Which this time,I definitely meant that.hihi.We were still amazed of how long its been.But he had to go.

So,the boyfriend called me a lil later.How thoughtful of him too=)Or maybe he wanted to ask if i was goin to art class.ahha,yea that was it.but hey we were on the phone quite long,talking crap.I actually miss him.And Im glad that everything seems to be better now.I think I understand what type of person he is.Hes not the type who would let his feelings out to me and everything but i guess,there must be some presence of love for me or at least care in him.Its a good thing that i did not give up on him.well,'kalau ada jodoh,xkan kemana"ahahah.ok,scratch that,thats lame.So,let me encapsulate and make it into one sentence:

Of all the things my masin mouth has complained about,that is every bit of him,i still very much like him,care about him,and still believe that theres hope.

There,ive said it.hmm.How did i get to this point anyways?All I wanted to say was,when i mentioned my bf,that i asked him to come with me to Alif's this saturday.N it got me into a confession.hah.=)If theres nothing more important than going to alif's,ill be there,as long as my bf could come along because i cant go there alone.

Thank u alif,love u n miss u much,old friend.
Thnx az,ur officially on the way to become my soulmate.For once i feel like i have a significant other and am glad that its you.=)

ill stop before i get all jiwang.hiihhi.n yes i refuse to talk about other stuff rite now other than my life with the bf.;)big issue.ahaha

friday night.

2007-10-20T19:48:00.000-07:00

of bunga apis,mercuns,a beautiful night(although there were'nt stars twinkling above or a moon shining,i was happy that it didn't rain)and most importantly all the people that turned up that night who made it all happen.Many don't know each other because there were new friends of mine,old comrades,school friends and ex-school friends which we never get to meet or hang at the same time and place.But I was happy to see all of them getting along like they knew each other.now thats!unity
;D Malay,chinese and indian.Thats how Malaysians should celebrate.All the three(or more)races together.I thank all of you for coming.Oh I want to apologise to those who went back empty handed without me giving duit raya.Im terribly sorry,I was too busy having fun to remember that little thing.but no worries i will find you people(i'll try my best for ex-school mates)and give it to you.Also i want to apologise to my friends who got stung by some termites at my garden(ground bees,according to kusu,wth??;pmy bf burst out laughing when she said this which made her threw a tissue box at him.hahhah;Dhilarious).Ive already told them to be nice to you people but i guess they were to degil to even listen to me.Just accept it like love bites or more like love stings,alrite guys?hee.;DIt was an enjoyable night and the best raya i've had in years.Thats it,you people are definitely in my list for next year's raya.:D

pictures at www.picasaweb.google.com/liyanafnd

feel free to see or grab.

syawal akan tiba!

2007-10-09T22:20:00.000-07:00

Di sini,ingin saya susun sepuluh jari jemariku meminta ampun atas salah dan silap,tidak kiralah dari kata2 mahupun perbuatan aku yang telah menyinggung perasaan.Sesungguhnya aku memang tidak sengaja.Oh,scratch that,yang sengaja pon,maafkanlah: ).Sebenarnya tidak berniat aku hendak lukakan hati kamu2 ini.Kamu semua sebagian besar dari hidupku.
1.mama dan papa
2.Fairuz dan Hafiz
3.cikjah,late aunty jai,aunty yah,aunty remah
4.Fye
5.miza,aiza dan nizar
6.bella dan thaqib
7.syafiq
8.azzari
9.petchai
10.shahrin
11.kawan2 non-muslim ku
12.rakan2
13.muslimin dan muslimat sekalian

1.
Mama dan papa.Jikalau hendak ku tuliskan segala dosa yang telah ku buat,sampai kucing bertanduk barulah boleh habis.ku tahu,aku anak yang derhaka.Tidak mahu mendengar kata tetapi tidak ada orang lain di dunia ini yang ku lebih menyayangi.Pendek kata,ku xboleh hidup dan tidak boleh ku bayangkan hidup tanpa kamu berdua..terima kasih atas segala kebahagiaan dan masa2 duka kita bersama.Kebahagiaan sentiasa datang bersama dugaan.Itulah hidup bagiku.
2.
Abang-abang aku,siapalah aku tanpa kamu berdua.Aku tak boleh bayangkan betapa bosannya hidup aku tanpa korang.Tak ada orang untuk cuit hati aku,buat aku ketawa terguling-guling,dan menyakitkan hati aku.aku ingat betapa gembiranya hatiku apabila korg kena marah dengan mama dan papa kerana menyakat aku.Padan muka!hahah.Seronok sungguh jadi the only anak perempuan.Bongsu pula tu.u guys pon terpaksa berkorban beberapa perkara demi aku.I cant thank you guys enough.You guys are the ones who coloured my life ever since i came into this world.hugs!
3.
my aunts.Speacially to cikjah and late aunty jai(although ur not here,u'll always be in memory and heart,i miss u so much.)You two have been like ibu ku sndiri.Jaga ku semasa kecil,melayan segala kerenah ku,masak untuk ku,membawa ku berjalan2 di kebun atuk dengan basikal buruknya,mandi perigi,dan mengibas-ngibas badanku dengan daun ape entah semasa ku dmm campak.Ku tidak boleh lupa masa2 dahulu.A typical kampung life and tidak boleh diulang lagi walaupun ku mahu ia berulang very badly.Semuanya telah berubah.Tidak sama lagi.Aunty jai pon telah meninggalkan kami.Apakan daya.
Aunty yah and aunty rhemah,i love u as much although we don't spent as much time together as i did with cikjah and aunty jai.Forgive everythin thats wrong.
4.
Fye,my closest cousin and friend.Kami berdua membesar bersama.wah terlalu banyak kenangan bersama lagi2 masa kecil sewaktu kita sangat sangatlah nakal omygod.Makan pon atas meja.mandi pon sama.Tdo,bermain,ke skolah,balik dari skolah semuanya sama2.hahah.ur like my twin and i louph u so much lah.hidup aku boring tanpa kamu couzie.maaf na,dosa2 yana terhadap fye.; )
p/s:rindu main 'kuda2 bantal'.hahah hanya kita berdua yang tahu.Walaupun kena marah dgn cikjah and aunty jai,kita tetap main secara sembunyi kan.degil sungguh.
5.
adik beradik fye.membuatkan family kami yang besar ni lagi kecoh.tu yang bes tuh.we rock together!trip ke mana2 saja kita pergi bersama.next trip ke morocco pada desember nnti.sangatlah tak sabar!
6.
belle n qib.minta maaf segala salah silap i.kamu org bes.sayang korang.
7.
okay im drained by now.hahah.ill make it quick.capik,ko kawan lelaki aku yang palaing first aku rapat.hang ni baik orgnya.dengar je segala masalah aku.aku pon dgr gak hang punya kan.selama ni xnah la kita gaduh and harap2 xdela gaduh2 ni.i pon happy la tgk u jumpe kekasih hang tu.semenjak tu xdalah cita lain besides ur kekasih.hahah,aku dengar ja.bes ke xbes ke,cite kawan aku akan tetap nak dengar.maaflah na kalau ada tersinggung masa kita busy luahkan cerita dan perasaan masing2.Thanks jugaklah for the masa nak borak2 tu.xde kau,susah jugak aku.
8.
Azzari.boyfriend aku.da 3 bulan kot kita bersama.satu hapak pon aku xpaham sama ko ni.pelik sungguh orangnya.Aku marah2 pon benci2 dalam hati pon,aku rasa aku sayang hang gak lah.tak tau mengapa tapi ada jugaklah rasa sayang tu.tah dari mana datang pon taktau.tapi aku ttp la marah kat hang.sebab tak balas balik kasih aku.ko xreti ke,atau xnak ke,aku pon xtau.aku cakap 'i love u' ko bukan nak balas pon.dulu hegeh2 nak aku,rajin msg skang hmph!rasa cam bodoh jugala aku ni.tapi aku xgiv up lagi la kat hang nih.nak tau gak cite hang.Kami boleh hidup dengan gembira tanpa contactin each other for more than a week.natural ke?xkan?haha.tapi itulah hakikatnya.Penat aku tgu kau msg aku tanya khabar.last2 aku jugak yang msg hang.hampeh betui hang nih.pe2 pon maafkan jelah ok.
9.
petchai.ko kawan paling baik kot aku jumpe.walaupun baru je kenal ko aku dapat tgk la,ko ni mmg treassure gila kawan.n im glad im one of ur friends.kite kenal kat art class masa nak habiskan projek seni yang bertimbun.last minute work,biasalakan petch.balik pon midnight nak menghabiskan tu.itu pon berhari2.lama jugaklah kita lepak.pegi hameed semua cari makan.hm,maaflah pe2 silap aku kat ko.rasa xde.heheh tapi manalah tau kan.
10.
Shahrin ismail.the drummer.aku pong baru jugak kenal hang ni.tapi fuh banyak gila aku tau sal hang.cam da 10 taun kenal lah.kalau kita borak tu,cam machine gun,mana taknya.besla kawan ngan hang.aku cita pon u dgr je kan.baik betul.penah hang skali ja ngan u.maafla xdpt buke puasa ngan hang hari tu.nnti2 lepeh spm kita lepak la sampai lebam na.yang lain pon maaf2kanlah.trima kasih banyak2 teman aku masa bosan2.ada juga org yang aku ley borak bersama cakap benda2 bodoh.sayang kau.
11.
kong,jane,shaloo,kusu,aneesha,chris,raja.u noe i love u ladies.maaf juga salah silap ku.muahhs

ok dah lah.selamat hari raya maaf zahir dan batin.

iTunes packed

2007-10-06T05:12:00.000-07:00

More songs uploaded.From pink floyd to velvet revolver to oag to the darkness to blink 182 to keane to led zeppelin to queen to smashin pumpkins to lillix and to 3 doors down and to before their eyes.Hah,yes,a whole load of em!And yea,refered to my itunes for this whole list of em.Goin to upload more soon from michael learns to rock.The band that ive been listening to all the time when i was younger.I just remembered of them recently.'Ive got time!' hahah.I really should be studyin ey?

Anyways.Besides mltr,Bon jovi has the greatest ballads ever.buatkan saya jiwang all the time.Back to bon jovi!yes,they really have the very best ballads.Although most of em sounds pretty much the same,I still feel every song has its own uniqueness.And man,jon bon jovi still looks good altho age is really catchin up on him.

Oh,im gonna download songs from our very own lagend,P.Ramli.yeahh.Since lee lian has always been mentionin him and erg singin his songs like an old radio that cant be shut.grins*yeah,lee lian is an amoi.haha malu aku;p.So,soon Ill start singing along with her.And the kareoke after our spm.oh spm.hum,whats that?

hahah.bdw,life is treatin me bad!nough said.

New product.Go get it tiger!grrr;p

2007-10-03T22:57:00.000-07:00

"herba produk.mencegah cancer prostat.Meningkatkan daya seksual.suami hebat isteri gembira;rumah tangga bahagia.Soyoung2u.com.call 03-42946436.CIK GEE"

BAHAHAHAHHAHAHA!!!i got this sms earlier on.what the ferck man.suami hebat isteri gembira??meningkatkan daya sexual?HAHAHAHAH! Is it really necessary to say all this?Man you gotta be kidding me.Im just wondering,is this more for the prevention of prostate cancer or more for the sexual arousement thing? think its more for the sexual arousement thing.It should be written like this then:

"herba produk yang pasti boleh meningkatkan daya seksual anda para lelaki.Suami hebat isteri pasti gembira.Secara tidak langsung,rumah tangga juga akan bahagia.Tambahan pula,herba produk ini boleh mencegah kanser prostat."

hah hahah.That should be it.
And i thought men have OVER 'daya seksual' already.They dont need this,what they need is practice.Muahahahah!

This really made my day.!Thank you,you stranger.
Man have i been gettin weird sms lately.

Are men facing extinction?

2007-10-03T08:07:00.000-07:00

Hairan.Mana pi semua laki yang macho2?

I feel like there are more gays around compared to LELAKI TULEN.Is doomsday coming really soon?wallahuallam.Wonder what its like in 10 years time.When 70% of men turn into gays.Have you ever thought of that?I certainly have,by looking roughly on people these days.Its conspicuous.Its undeniable and so unbelievable of how big the number is.You'll definitely bump into a gay guy everywhere you go.Malls,mamak stalls,gyms u name it.They are everywhere!This is bothering me.I go to malls to get some eye candy aka cuci mata.And its so dissapointing to come home without a hot guy in mind to day dream of!haih,begitu kecewa.isk isk isk.

Manalah lelaki Melayu yang hot hot belaka.Yang bersuara megah which can melt a girls heart.Yang berbadan 'tough' (tetapi bukanlah macam arnold susahnaeja) dan bukan 'kempeng'.Yang bermata tidak terlalu besar dan tidaklah terlalu kecil(hahah).Gone,they're all gone.What is left are all the 'jambus' and the 'aws'.Lelaki yang tulen pon tidaklah setulen tulennya.Semuanya GEDIK.They think adorable is cute?Ahh,it maybe cute but pfft come on,I don't wanna marry an 'adorable' guy.I want 'macho'!macho man!For gods sake,TOUGHEN UP please guys.Too adorable can be annoying.Sure,!!you'll get all the attention u want badly from girls 'girls keliling pinggang',but them girls are not gonna fall for you.Don't you get it?They are going to be your 'bff',your bestfriends until one day you'll wake up on your little bed when you're 30 and realize that you don't have a real girlfriend and are still living with your parents.Hah,yes.Berfikirlah wahai lelaki2 sekalian.Jangan sampai tak kawin dan janganlah menyusahkan ibu bapa sahaja.And this is one of the factors of why men turn into gays.Plus,i didn't know that some guys can be so concious of what they do,wear or even talk.isk isk sungguh tak macho.Yes,get my defination of macho?good.

Second factor.Are you ready?This came from one of my guy friends from Indonesia.Bdw,hes not gay,its just his opinion.ahahahh;p.According to him,girls give guys too much pressure with their high demand on certain things.With that,they couldnt take it and they get too stressful,give up and turn into gays.Seriously,girls CaN be bitchy and so I cant disagree.But,why are you guys such sissies?Again,TOUGHEN UP please.Take everything like a man.Be a fuckin MAN.!

Its sad,really really sad.To all the 'pure' men out there,i suggest you people to be a little preachy and save your species!

a day with instruments

2007-10-01T04:52:00.000-07:00

sara dan aku

i suck and thus i dnt deserve to be in the picture; )

di tgh2 malam begini.....

2007-09-30T10:01:00.000-07:00

azzari,
Of all the sayang kamu(s) and i love you(s) i said to you that were seldom replied back,i still do miss you a lot.I miss your mengadaness and the fact that u have this very limited memory.(hahh).miss your weird craps.How you would speak only english with your british(or was it american) accent.Well,now you do speak malay.fuh.Miss talking to you through the phone where theres always silence between us after 5 minutes of talking,and we'll go..'soh..'back to back non stop for a few seconds till we find a new topic to talk about.ha ha.miss seein you.n so wanna cuddle with you again because you have the warmest hug ever although youre as skinny as a stick.Isnt it ironic?dnt u think?;)
i do really really miss you.and this is not a lie.theres so much more to know about you.Just hope theres time.
not in sight doesnt mean not in mind.

aku sayang kau lah gedik!; )

ur awek,
lyana

.......saya jiwang

gettin high with high

2007-09-29T14:33:00.000-07:00

Downloaded a few songs from limewire yeaterday.One of em is james blunt's high.'High' really makes me FLOAT and really gets me HIGH listening to it especially at the chorus where he sings 'hiiiiiiigggggghhhhh' with that sweet and comforty pitch.ooouhh damn.Hes a genius;)
I know it has been released ages ago and the thought of downloading it HAS been clinging on my mind eversince but it just didnt pop out whenever i hang around limewire trying to figure out what songs to download.Soh,im really glad that it finally came back to my lil memory last night.
Also downloaded a few others of his'.Not my favourite though.Others include 'ironic' from the great alanis morissette,'Sing' by travis and 'The skin of my yellow country teeth' by Clap Your Hands and Say Yeah.A band from brooklyn.Been around for quite sometime already but i just knew this band and i have to say for this song they sound a lil like ozma at the begining and ending of the song and when i heard it for the first time i baffled for a moment.His voice.Its horrible!he sounds like a wasted drunken and dehydrated man when he sings that.I still like it though.The drum beats are simple,very basic but if its with open-and-close high hat it would make the song a lil upbeat and more awesome.Overall,love it.Them clap your hands and say yeah:

So,all these went into my lil ipod shuffle last night including the songs jayzuan gave me through the net.Well,his songs actually.hah hah;p.According to my ears,my fav among the 3 songs of his would be 'selamat tinggal'.But dangg,it just makes me laugh when the part where he sings 'maafkanlah salah laku' comes as he sorts of exaggerate his accent on the word 'laku'Hahah man u should listen to this.But overall,again,good song.sad,mellow.n Im thinking of jammin 'si dia';p.Its a fun song.Haha jayzuan tentu would be very flattered.;p
I also asked for free love's indierock darlin.Love that song.Great indie.
Oh and not to forget weezer's Buddy holly,hash pipe and perfect situation.I dont fancy buddy holly.Its too idk.Well,i just dnt fancy it.hash pipe on the other hand is a typical weezer.And i like it very much.Perfect situation,as many would have been very familiar to it,its A ok.

weezer.They still rock.
Yeap,thats about it.Bdw checked out pavillion just now.its HUGE!thats all i can say abt it.ha ha.
cheerio.

cash $$$

2007-09-28T02:05:00.000-07:00

Last month was the first time i ever bought a 13 ringgit eyeliner from silkygirl(after discount).Of course,my mum was the one who was soo kind to pay for it .Well,after i did a long face that is.My usual eyeliner was a 4 buck eyeliner from chamelon.Im not a cheapskate,to tell the truth i can never keep my wallet fat.

Why?First reason.If i have money I would spent and spent and spent like theres no tomorow,bak kata perpatah,belanja tak ingat dunia.
Second.The reason why my wallet could not grow fat(with money) is simply because i dont have money!I get A BUCK a day for school,summing up to 5 bucks a week,10 bucks for two weeks and 20 bucks for a month with four weeks.Id be very lucky to get 25 bucks for a month.pffft u say,but i am not pulling anyones leg here..I really face money crisis that is very unbearable and unacceptable.With a buck a day,its jussssst enough for a bread with sliced sausages on top.Which with no comment,i do love eating that and wouldnt mind eating it everyday.And i could actually eat nasi goreng with a buck which i chose not to since it will blow me up like a balloon after a month.Anyways,ive surveyd the canteen food and anything thats below a buck is not my cuppa tea.SO,with a buck,i could eat good food but then theres aaaaaa liiitlllle problem.There wont be any savings!Im sure u'll say i could be smarter and pack food from home instead.Well,i just dnt want home food!hmm.
Im underpaid for going to school.And for this week,since i went to school only twice,i get TWO bucks which i wanted to save since its fasting month but rabaeh,our class' treasurer,came up to me and asked for two bucks for the class money.geez man.like what the ferck.;((
* * * *
about the eyeliner,i LOST it.i never lose my 4 buck eyeliner but when i was just about to use this 13 buck eyeliner for the second time,i couldnt find it!gahh.Ada toyol dengki kat rumah aku nih.!

I need to figure out how to make money from now on since i'll definitely be broke once i finish school.One way to earn money is to wait for raya.*grins*and of course,work.Or im thinking of making t shirts which everyone seems to be doing nowadays.There would be competetion but if they're nice and unique people still wont mind buying.Yeah,IF.And its all about talent here.Im good at copying stuff but not at designing.Ill still try though.desperate times,id do anything except the ones that require me to do something (and melt) under the hot sun.

And oh!i have 10 bucks in my wallet and need another 10 bucks for a new eyeliner.when is the 10 bucks coming??***in a million years.sigh.

yesterday was my aunts birthday.happy birthday!!i love you so so much.!!

just an old pic of us in pd.

Lastly,happy 3 months anniversary to me n the bf.ha ha.

blogspot an ASS!

2007-09-26T01:03:00.000-07:00

WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED TO ALL THE PICTURES ON MY FREAKIN BLOG???
GAH,BENGANG BODO.

somebody tell me how to overcome this.i WANT the pics on my blog!

haih bosan

2007-09-25T22:33:00.000-07:00

news flash:
graduation will be held at metro inn hotel in kajang.pffft!i prefer it to be in school where its a lil less formal and it'll be much more interesting and fun to do it at night.Since it'll be in metro inn,its from 9 freakin AM till noon.like ape kes ni buat pagi!bodo gila!im also not sure if my band can perform then.If its in school it would not be much of a problem or hastle.gah,everythins ruined.This is why i hate planin things.coz the plan NeVer goes as planned.forget bout this then.And im so not planning anything fer prom.I'll go with the flow~

Aku sangat lapar harini.lagi2 hujan,sejuk,bertambah lapar la aku.nothings stoppin me from eating tho.*grins.hahah,aku xpose.yeah nikmat,mari mari!

bdw,esok ponteng sekolah lagi.3rd day for this week.and hightlight for today is that i got to know next week is a week off!hell yeah baby.our adek2 is having their pmr and we'll get a week of freedom.
I went school just now and sat for 3 diagnostic papers.For the rest of the time,i was busy chit chattin with sara about no other than ducktoi and our local bands which are seriously gettin better nowadays.Im very impressed with the malaysian music industry which is very much improving.bravo!

To name a few bands:oag(always ware awesome),the times,couple,muck,free love, and hujan.they're awesome.Ill definitely try to catch their gigs once im 'allowed' to go out.To mohd Jayzuan from free love,tahniah juga.i bet ur duin well with ur solo career though i find ur songs to be rather too 'jiwang karat' for me;p.Jangan mara ye abg jay.Lyana masih dgr lagu2 kamu kemana jua.ahaks!cheers;)

free love

couple

hujan

MUCK

Jay

oag

support local music scene!
cayalah lyana.ahahaks;p

hah,perut pon dah berkeroncong.time to eat.*grins.once again.*
ta.

little thoughts:confused

2007-09-25T07:30:00.000-07:00

I feel like evryone is avoiding me.Well not everyone but,why is the boyfriend not replyin my comment??The last time he did that was before he ask for a break up.dnt tell me another break ups coming.damn.
and shahrin,miss him.havent talked like before for quite sometime and he'll only reply my message once.
i thought i was nice to everyone.

what now?
xpaham man.

a lie turns out to be a disaster

2007-09-24T07:52:00.000-07:00

Well,okay,not really a disaster but..
hah,heres the story.I was too lazy to wake up for school this morning and fortunately i got my period and with that,had some reasons to lie to my mum.I told my mum that i had period cramps and so,i have to skip school.And well i did.BUT,god was angry with me and gave me cold.yes,COLD.Im having running nose and its annoying.However,im okay with it though.

I SO DNT WANT TO GO TO SCHOOL and sit for another 5 sets of diagnostic papers!Im tired of exams!god.i've been having exams straight for more than a month already.I know,i know,im so not ready for spm.I know i have to change.I know,i know what i should do.But,i really need a break...terribly.please,just another day,get me well and ill start new.well,ill try.please god,i beg u...

and oh,since my band couldnt get another chick to play the guitars or bass,fye(my cousin)is our sessionist.Just for the mean time till we find a girl who can play.So,now its 3 girls and a guy.heh.very odd.oh,we're like 'the course' now.huhu.bdw,any girls here up for this?any guitarist in the house??inform me=)

song selections:

island in the sun-weezer
with or without control-sahara hotnights
promises-the cranberries

thats all for now.few simplest songs which arnt really simple to me.damn!i need to improve with my drumming!

Another good news is,a couple of days back,a guy named AM,some of my friends' friend asked me to join his band and play indie.I was excited about it but at the same time i was scared.so i chickened out with a lame reason of 'nak majukan the band i have now first'.But he sort of begged me(because there isn't any other drummers).And he convinced me by saying they are all noobies(new to bands)and that they wanna take it slow and nasz(a friend of ours who is a great drummer and not to mention,my idol)will teach me how to play..And so i sort of agreed,i guess.the vocalist will be a girl.I have to say that this might work well.but,the little problem is that,i know none of them!even Am himself.i havent even met him and i might be 'gelabah' aka nervous and not relaxed when i play the drums,which will make everything worse.I guess i have to practise ALOT and try to relax.
we'll start when we're all free.

Heres Am:

wish me luck.

life update

2007-09-24T05:36:00.000-07:00

Life has been great for the past few months till today.I got myself a new boyfriend,after two and the half years with the ex.I thought,i seriously wasnt gonna get any other guy once i break up with the ex because i never really liked many guys.Most guys i've known arent just my type.The miracle is that,just right before i set my words for breaking up with the ex,i met a new guy at art class.And yes,to my surprise,i like him.I like him a lot.Hes no other ordinary guy.hes prety different.And so i broke up with the ex and got together with this new guy days after.
heres a pic of the boyfriend:

woopsie,my bad;)

yeap,this is he.

done.enough with my lovelife.

EOS 350D.
why the fuck can i get this thing?Ive been wanting a dslr since last year.My mom knows how badly i want this thing.Ive even wanted to use my own money(from the bank) to get this thing.But no,she says papa will get me one IF i come off with flying colours for spm.And thats next year!AND IF i live up to their high expectations.Damn,god is really testing my patience here.Everybody else has turned into a pro in photography.I dont even have a freaking dslr.I mean pfft,i cant do much with a sony cybershot can i.ive been using but theres limits.theres noise n i cant really zoom it,and the shutter speed macam siput!curse!

sara,neb and yours truly.
The Cheer-i-Os.
I finally formed a girl band which I wanted to since i was kicked from a band with a bunch of guys last year.Ahh,no big deal though,they havent really gone up and i think will start off at the same time as us.Moving on.It actually took months for me to realize that i have a friend(well not close at that time)who could play the guitar very well.And I thought,hey why not we form a band.I approaced her and she agreed there n then.Neb,bless you.And sara,I really cant wait to hear u sing;p bless you too.We 3 amigos are all up and up for this!

neb on guitars,sara on vocals and myself on the drums.I hope i dont dissapoint them as I dnt have much drumming skills and not to mention my timing sucks.Tho,i promise myself to get as much practise as i can and hope we're good enough to start off playing at gigs and shows.Well this sunday will have our first ever jamming practise at my place.Theres a graduation dinner,for my school in october and we'll be performing,if god will give us a chance.We really need to play for this graduation as our first experience before we perform at my schools prom in december.
ahh yes,prom.
heres the link,anyone,do check it out.its for the public.If anyones free on that day,do come.dnt be shy.Its really open to public.

www.myspace.com/theprom2007.

aite.cheerio everyone.

hello earthlings!

2007-09-24T05:14:00.000-07:00

Im here adding to the number of people on blogspot.com.I havent been blogging for quite sometime now.I have a livejournal but i guess im too bored with it already.so,hello blogspot.Ill be serving u,with my posts for as long as i can.

Fyi.the names lyana,from kajang,Malaysia.17 and proudly finishin high school in another two months time.Though,Im surely gonna miss school,seriously.Im not sure what im really good at but i have passion for a few things.3 things that are generally 'me' or what im in to are these:
*arts
*bands
*photography

And,ive been in love with kurt cobain since forever.hes 7 feet under but what the heck,ive never seen anyone as great as he is.
cheers everyone.=)

LYANA EFFENDI