goodbye 07

07 was one of the best years in my life.seriously ,it was the ultimate teen life.well,somehow.it was great without putting spm aside.spm was an experience.I mean,u only sit for one spm in your life and it was surely something i wanted to go through.Though it wasnt great but after it has ended there was a great feeling.Partly because it was a relief,of course but it was also because well somehow i felt proud of myself.Not that i did well but simply because i sat for it till the end.gah,u get what i mean rite.i love ups as well as the downs.makes me appreciate life more.

I just got back from morooco.Trip to Morocco was another great great experience.The food,people,surroundings,basically everything is different from the typical life we live in or even the british or australian.If u've been to a poor country,u might get what i mean.But what i like about morocco is,although the people are poor,they have this amazing culture which they nurture and just keeping them alive.They have their own style of living and the things they make.90% of their stuffs are handmade.its just amazing.If you dont appreciate art,culture or if ur not adventurous,dont go morocco.Its a waste.If u love lamb,they have the best lamb in the world.U can never get it anywhere else.Tagine is one of their local dishes.They have tasty tagine lamb up in the mountains.Thats like the original tagine.The ones you find in restaurants arnt that nice.they also have 'cous cous',their local dish as well.its wheat,they eat em everyday just like how we eat rice.not too bad.it goes with the chicken.sort of like nasi briyani except that the cous cous make it taste different.But again,if ur not the adventourous type,like my brother we call him hero kampung,because he cant eat those stuff at all.he wouldnt.Well it was great.the weather was good.sunny.very cold.didnt rain at all when we were there.there was one night which we had to watch a cultural show outside,at night.8 degrees.can u imagine.and it was a long show.everyone was numb by the end of the show.lol.Even Hassan,our driver got a headache because of that.hes a local!whos the tourist now?haha.and we got snow up in the mountains.lucky us.well,overall,it was a great trip.though the transit and flight was hell.

On 07 too,i found someone new.Im with shahrin now.Hes a great guy.No one really cared bout me like he does and i feel very comfortable hanging out with him.nk sepak pon sepak je.sekeh pon sekeh lah.well,at first i didnt think my feelings for him would grow.i thought u know,ive liked other people too.but somehow i feel he can take care of me very well.just hope everything runs smoothly this time.i hope things dont change for the worse and i like the way it is now.i hope he understands me well and doesnt change.im happy and i like him now like how i first met him.I feel secure with him.one thing bout him,he knows how to do that.hai org tua,i love u.trima kasih banyak,buat aku gembira.; )

2008.a new year.who knows what comes next.just chill,wait and see.till next time.happy new year all!

this year is D year!

Prom was AWESOME!its more than awesome i couldnt even explain how awesome it was.omg!!to those who didnt come,u guys missed a huge thing here.rnr john,u guys made it happen man.and of course dj shashi,ur the best dude.with ur lightings and the music.dayem!!it felt like we were in zouk man.Really didnt want it to end.kongy made prom queen(as expected)hahah.and lester made prom king,also,as expected.it was fun man.danced and danced headbanged and headbangd jumped and jumped.gah,i feel like turning back time to that night once again.

n oh,they called me lingerie model.because my dress was like a lingerie,duh and its see through.hahah.yeah was i crazy or wat!no wonder boys were hitting on me.winks/

prom pics not done.


rantai art event was....okla.though i didnt manage to sell my shirts.but,i still got 6 orders for some of my designs,which i really have to do soon.im happy with that for a start.im in for some money.im broke.

off to morocco this wenesday.YIPPY!!!!bye2 malaysia.will be back new years eve.cant wait to take good photos.

schedule

8.00pm – Entrance to Perdana Ballroom [Food is ready to be served]

8.15pm – Band I(the melodies)

Song One :

Song Two :

Song Three :

song four :

8.45pm – Waltz

9.15pm - Band II [5 songs](couple)
1. tentang kita
2. gotta be my gurl
3.rock n roll
4.now that i can see
5. love you yes

9.45pm – Band III [4 songs](rnr john)

song 1:johnny b. good

song 2:bob joe

song 3:tuti fruti

song 4:marilyn


10.00pm – Prom King and Queen announcement

10.15pm – Slow dancing

10.30pm – DJ

11.00pm – Food can be cleared off

1.00 am – Event ends


[the melodies are doing 2 beatles cover]

oh

its 2.55 am on a thursday which means prom is tomorrow.oh my god.Well everythings almost settled.Whats left is for me to print out 5 copies of the schedule for the comittee members.Text acap again bout the extra equipments which i really hope i can get so that the sound system can be improved.And of course,be at the hotel by 9 am tomorrow as promised to lee lian the bosh.I have to get to work immediately.First thing is to set up my drums then ill move on to helping shashi with the amps and stuff.I hope that it can be settled by noon.I'll have my break and the bands will start coming for soundchecks after friday prayers which is around 2.30 pm.i hope everything goes smoothly.

schedule:

9.00 am -set up of the equipments
12.00pm -break
2.30 pm -soundcheck(the melodies)
3.30 pm -soundcheck(rnr john)
6.30 pm -soundcheck(couple)
7.00 pm -get ready!

ill be wearing a black dress,very short,yes quite sexy indeed.It was not my intention to reveal much of my skin but i was too lazy to search for another dress.I got this dress unintentionally last few months when i was walking around with my friend at a mall in kajang.It costs me 70 bucks.Well,reasonable i guess for a simple yet 'sweet' dress.Not an ordinary prom dress i shall say.Its more of a party dress.Ah well,i think it suites me well though.I think im happy that i bought it.Just one problem though.stomach can be seen as it is a lil body hugging.Ive been doing seat ups for the past month but ya know,didnt get the abs shakira,j lo or beyonce have.god i love their abs.But im happy that my waistline got smaller eversince and a lil less fat around my belly.I guess i wont be eating tomorrow.Heh,yes i would do that.

I asked this one guy to be my date if he ever comes to my prom.i mean i textd him,of course.Yesterday he said he'll come if he has the money.but when i texd him today saying if he comes to prom alone,be my date,i didnt receive any reply.So its either hes out of credit or that simply means no.Ahh well,i was turned down i guess.Its not that i mind so much but it'll be nice to have a date,i thought.Better yet with a good looking guy.well,'boleh tahan' la.heheh.

Az decided to come to my prom after god knows how many times he changed his mind about this and i wont be surprise if he decided not to go at the very last minute.Well,its all up to him though.

I cant wait to see all the gorgeous people and just jumping,headbanging and dancing to some awesome music with awesomest friends and not to mention,its parent-free.Its what every 17 year olds should experience at this time of their lives.Another thing a 17 year old should experience is to not go home for at least a day.Thats right.I wont be going home after prom and i have no idea where ill be sleeping.I told my mum ill be sleeping at a friends house.But ya know,i dont think so.I planned to hang out all night with friends.And i guess i'll sleep wherever.Will be going straight for rantai the nxt morning.xmandi.heh.!

Well,ill just see how it goes then..im off to get some sleep.goodnite.

high school graduation

Graduation was a blast last nite!It was awesome.Only 4 teachers turned up and not many of the form 5s turned up anyway.so like half of the crowd was our friends(the bands n their crews),hijau to be more precise.It was great ya know.though the sound system was not that good and most of the kids didnt enjoy the performances.haha,they were dead!i ENJOYED them.i was jumping around like mad.man i love live shows.cant wait for prom.

The evening started off with pelat,hijau's vox singing two of his songs.solo,just something while waiting for other bands to come.The Dearly missed played second.The vox is cute.haha and his voice isnt that bad.good performace.they were great.sang 5 songs i think.sara was drooling over him and not to mention my camera was full of his pics.Then Oh chentaku performed.they were great too.the drummer is hebat.but then,im not really a fan of theirs but i still headbanged to their songs though.hahah.Last band to perform was hijau.cooled down a lil with their indie.I was already tired by that time too.haha.they were all awesome.and thanx to hijau and their crew for staying back and help me load my drumset back in the car.couldnt do it without you boys.And yesterday was also the first time i met am= ),the guy who asked me to join his band dulu.not bad looking and baik .oh cawand,robot and kayrel,nice meeting u guys too.

next event will be prom and rantai.This weekend will be packed.i cant wait!ill be going solo for prom.time for an eye candy and hooking up with someone hot.hahah;)cheers

out again

this time with fye,capik,acap and neb.lepak2lah lepeh spm nih.and kire celebrate baday fye skali lah.omg.been so long since last lepak with capik.haha sonok gk td.

future dilemma

Tomorrow will be the last day before my high school year ends.It'll be my last 1h 15 minutes sitting in class and doing a high school examination paper.My art paper.yes.Finally.People keep asking me what i want to be when i grow up.To tell the truth I dont know what I wanna be.I mean,for a living.To actually do it for the rest of my life and earning enough.What i normally tell them is i want to be a journalist.Well,sure it is something that im interested in but then again,not entirely.My passion and interest still lies in art.Though,i would really love to try out journalism,doing some writting and stuff.My English isnt good enough but I know i can work it out.My dad already has plans for me.Im taking an english short course next year to futher improve in it as well as to get a certificate so that itll be much easier for me later on to get into uni.Im also going to take a short photography course.Basically im just going to try to improve in everything which i have interest in.And what comes later on is another thing.If possible i would like to get into uitm taking mass communication.But im not confident of getting into uitm since i have no idea what ill get for my spm and quite a big number of students are into mass com.loads of competetion here.So,most probably,as it seems,my parents are going to put me into taylors college.But i really really hope that i'll get uitm coz you know,i dont have to use up alot of my dad's money.College will definitely be expensive.
hah,bingung juga kepala aku pikir pasal bende nih.I dont know if i can enjoy right now.Im pretty worried bout these stuff.I dont know what im gonna be in 6 years.Im worried bout my results.I dont think i did well enough.ape nak jadi ngan aku!!

out

Went out today with sara and neb to get our tshirts kosong utk rantai nnti.spinning jenny dapat booth on 15 and 16 dec.alhamdulillah ada rezeki;p.ada rezeki but at the same time buat aku pokai.harini je dah guna 70 bucks.and i still owe 35 bucks.gah dammit.byk betui gna duit bende nih.lagi2 spinning jenny just 3 orang.Booth ja da 60 bucks.so split pon,sorang 20 bucks.haih,mahal2.anyway,did i tell you today was fun?well it was.havent hang out for pretty long.so berbaloi juga lah tgu bas berjam nk sampai.nak balik pong terpaksa diri lama dengan jamnya lagi dgn org tolak menolak.Oh,speaking of org tolak menolak,most people really dnt have the courtesy to even say 'excuse me'.i mean how hard is that?pft bodoh punya olang!Anyways,we manage to reach annexe and got our t shirs kosong.unfortunately we got only whites.We wanted sort of vintage colours but the shop attendant tu kata wont be able to get easily.plus because we need em quick.so white it is.Now i have to do 7 designs and i havent start with any.gah.ill be 'bz'.hahah.i really need ilham man.mintak2 jadilah my designs.amin.

Minggu lepeh lagi da ajak2 shahrin mai lepak annexe today.he said he wont be coming back.tiba2 smlm rabu msg kata xde class and da balik.so i ajak him lepak and he said segan because my friends will be there.haishh hang nih mmg nak kena.paksa jugak dia datang tadi so he did come.heheh.setelah lama xbertemu ngan dia dapat la jgk jmpe tadi.lepas rindu kat hang.and bumped into jay.amik gmbar semua.biasala..dengan org fames.xlepeh peluang kan.haha.heres the pics.








oh the third picture is pakcik jual t yg baik hati.heheh.the last pic,i look like an old woman.pfft.nice pic anyway coz its very clear,sarah tangkap.; )shahrin bersabarlah.sara mmg suka buli orang.tapi baguih la.hang slalu buli aku.padan muka.haha.
hah well its a very tiring day sbb tgu bas lama tu and jalan jauh.plus i didnt eat today.only ate 3 kaya balls for breakfast.hahah,but then again,it was fun.cheers

alone

damn..kindda lonely tonight.=(
i should get use to this.


so i shoot myself to kill time.still felt lonely after that.and not to mention took so many shots and im only satisfied with this.thats why i hate shooting self portraits.im just not for it.

aku kesunyian.i admit.how do u sigletons do it.

AKTA ANGKASA

I FREAKING FELL IN LOVE WITH THEM.SUCH AWESOME BAND EXIST!
I SWEAR TO GOD I LOVE THEM TO THE CORE.
i LOVE them.


I wont stop saying this.again,i LOVE them.
They're just simple AWESOME.

local bands that i DEFINITELY support:
-mercy mercy
-akta angkasa
-jeorpardice
-teenage glory for the wasted
-telephony delivery.

U GUYS are AWESOME.

great day

we got the keys to our new condo in kl.Sri Maya.nice condo.We're gna stay there maybe for a month or so next year and gna rent it out after that.Well,17 taun duk kajang nk merasa jugak duk kl kn.hehheh.senang sket nak kuar rayau2.train station is just across the road.



omg,is that a 50 year old guy on that thing??
ahhh...Nope.he's 53.and hes my dad alrite.!hahha.mmg macam budak kecik!;p.i looovee uuu!

naik gila aku naik bnde ni ngan dia.lol

mama pon tak tau mana nk hide malu.hahah;p.

I cant wait for our unit to be furnished.looks like we have to shop for some furnitures soon.So,later we went bukit bintang.law yatt to get.ehem this baby:

hahah yes,finaly.And then we went back n out again for dinner at novatel.My bro hafiz came from damansara.Dinner with the family.5 of us.love that.food was good.
bottom line,today was a family day out and it was great.;)

fuck all perverts!

IDIOTS!such losers.

spinning liyana

My heads spinning.Im more confused than ever.So confused that i don't even want to think about it.Why do things get so complicated at times.Im liyana.the happy jumpy kid.the happiest girl in the universe.Well,so it seemed.Ignorance is bliss but i dnt know how to ignore things.And its bothering me and i dont like it.im having mixed emotions here.I WANT TO BE OUT OF THE COUNTRY!away from people for a while.bdw do you know what love is?oh yes i do.ive been in love once.whats the feeling like?it was awesome.i couldnt sleep and when i do all i dream is that one person.and makan x kenyang mandi xbasah.It makes me happy that i can even shed a tear.it makes me float and i felt like i have wings to fly.it was so beautiful that even the cheesy love lines doesnt seem pathetic but seemed so true.That was with my first boyfriend and the love didnt last in me bacause he was over protective which shoved me away.too loving that he was obsessed with me.too obsessed that he was always emotional even on little things that got in our way.He was often sick and he needed me 24/7.I really mean 24/7.i felt like his mother more than his girlfriend.he needed my comfort too much that i couldnt give it anymore.I felt like a boyfriend,giving all those care and comfort while i dnt get much.What i got is not being able to talk to other people.He was too afraid that they would fall for me.too afraid too lose me.That is an obsession.I am obsessed with kurt don cobain.people get obsessed with their idols but not their partners.It felt like my world was in his hands.He was too crazy over me that i even thought he needed theraphy.Because he couldnt do it,couldnt live even when im busy for a while.i loved him but thats not how it should be.thinking of him makes me crazy.i couldnt bear that kind of life.n so i broke up.It was other way round with azzari.Totally opposite.the 24/7 text messeges with my first boyfriend came down to 2-3 messeges a week with my new boyfriend.It felt different especially after two and a half years with the first one.after 2 n a half years being so used to every-minute messeges.It was a big change for me.totally a big change.everything else was different too.Although i can count how many times i went out with my first boyfriend(meaning we didnt go out much),i still was so very deep in love with him.I dnt see why it couldnt work with az.but it really couldnt and didnt.Maybe were're not meant for each other?As much as it hurts,i accept it.i gave up and accept it.reconcile?ive thought about it.but i dnt think im going for it.i dnt want to be asked for outings and cant make it.i dnt want to be unavailable to him as a gf.i dont want to dissapoint him.Thats whats hard for me.And so i guess my decision is final.yes.only now.I think its best this way.


CRAP!another personal entry.

die! die!

addmaths was a BITCH!

gah.sian kn?xpasai ja kene pgl bitch.sapa suruh xblajak awai2 kan?.sian addmaths,sian aku.since ini kali terakhir aku negok kau dan jawab soalan2 kau,aku ucapkan slamat tinggal,addmaths.Aku harap aku xbertemu dgn kau lagi pada masa hadapan.bertemu dengan saudara kau moden maths tak apa.tapi dgn kau,tolongla tglkan aku.Maaflah sebab terlalu banyak aku mencarut kat kau dan pgl kau assmaths.mana tak fail kan?haih.selamat tgl.

introducing:

coming soon.
muahahah!*evol laugh*

hiihhi;p hah,life is treating me god damn good!and also,great plans ahead.Well,enough with boyfriends and all that."i dnt need a man"lol.its just that im doing a major on myself now.soon i mean.new time,this time 'SELF DISCOVERY'time.yes,it has come.time for me to 'berkembang' since Im gnna be 18 in 3 n a half months time.i have to make a great history here.not for anyone else's sake but for my own.and anyone care enough to throw me a party next year?hihi.bdw,ive been telling too many personal things here.ill take a break frm that.well,since there is nothing personal to talk about.heh;D

oh about the 'spinning jenny' thingy,well....coming soon=)

keeping fingers crossed

I hope ill get to display (and sell,if anyone wud wanna buy) my art stuff at RANtAi's art event on the 16th of dec.Still waiting for the confirmation from this new friend i made(hahah,on myspace;p) who was really kind enough to offer me a space to display my artwork.By that he means joining him and his band (matematik) if they get a table.If they dont,he still will help me find a table from his friends.Well,i jus need a LIL space anyway: )

His band,matematik will be performing there on the 16th alongside couple and..and many other bands.heheh.
well since his helpful i should probably promote his band.listen to their songs at:

amp.channelv.com/matematikmusik

and their band page:

www.myspace.com/matematikmusik

hiihi.cheers

no more lyana-azzari

Well,it was mutual.BOth of us felt strange as a couple.i told in my previous entries that i was not ready to give up on him but just about a week ago,i did.i actually did gave up.And luckily he felt the same,and we talked just about a few minutes ago.so we are singletons from today onwards.My feelings?idk.I think its better this way.Because theres absolutely no north-south magnet between us.And i absolutely dnt mind being single.infact i havent been single for almost 3 years!ive been with my ex for 2 and a half years,broke up and got together with az 5 days later till today.well,3 months of nuthing with him.i mean as a couple.but friends,yea it was something.Didnt regret anything though.I am going to be single for as long as i can.Although theres someone whos been waiting for me,i dnt want to be in a realtionship right now.Unless its the guy that ive liked since i was 12.6 years.wayyy before my ex even.man,hes the only guy ive really liked.too long i have to say.never got the chance to even talk to him though.But i hope someday i will.and someday,he'll know.perhaps;/

The Brothers

one of the most disgusting man alive;my brother.yet,its wat makes him unique and explains why people love him.hes entertaining.i mean,VERY.Will be dead without him.he also has this idk,this thing with old people.Soft hearted i have to say.Aunties and grandma LOVES him.No,im really serious.yes,i dnt say this often and ill only say it once.enough praising.i love u brother.

HAPPY 22nd(i think,haha)BIRTHDAY IN ADVANCED.



HAPPY BELATED 26th BIRTHDAY ABG HAFIZ.
ur bossy,but i love you too:)

one last time

Lord,God,Allah,

im praying for u,begging you, for one little thing for now.Please,please and please,keep my mind steady,relaxed as it can be,all the notes and everything ive learned thsts in my head to be 'queing' patiently and 'comes out' only when i need em,get back in line when i dont need em,dnt let em run around like crazy pigs in my head.it'll make things harder,giving me a headache,and'll leave me blank.You see,no one wants that.i certainly dnt want that.Ya Allah,let the ideas flow in and out smoothly.ones out make sure theres enough time for me to jod em down and not just flow in the air and blown far away by the wind.Once back in make sure they're back 'in line','queing' for their turn if ever i need em once again for another point.Ya tuhan,please let my hands be calm and not shaking.Let me write with the best writting.As clear as i could so that it will set a pleasant mood for the examinor to read.Most gracious,please let my eyes be wide open,see things clearly.Let me read every word there is in the question papers with my brains working well at the same time.Bring me memories and ideas.make them come to life while i answer every single question.Let me question myself and answering the questions right away.Let it be right.Let it be right,i beg u.Most merciful,let my heart beat as steady as it could.Bring me far away from getting a nervous break down.Im ready to use the brains u gave me.Dnt let me panic.Im worried because im certainly not worried at all right now as if im sitting for a normal test.So please,i dnt want to panic once in the hall.please!

amin.

spm

its this monday.12th nov 07.ready or not,time wont wait.it has come and i have to sit for it.ill be writting down everything and anything i know for the last time of my high school history.everything and every single thing that i can remember from what ive learnt all these years.Panic,is the one thing that im worried of.What makes me panic?The thought of getting the results next year,yes,and also for not being fully prepared.Why am i not fully prepared?The thought of the joy ill be getting after finishin/semi-finish the papers.Why am i so stupid?I have no idea.I dnt dare to say i dread this spm because therell only be one spm and one chance in my life.yeah,again,THIS is it.It feels like im in my subconcious state untill now.2 days before spm.What is hapenin with me?i absofuckinlutely have no idea.People,i myself wish myself the best of luck all the time.Its not possible to not think about spm at his moment.Just yesterday i was still having fun and fooling around,had a wonderful night with the family.U must be wondering,am i kidding myself.Someone even labelled me as 'hero' for still being online and not studying.Well,i thank you.But,its not that i dont study at all.i do,to be honest.Maybe just not much or enough to score a string of straight A's.I have my target but maybe just not very ambitious,well at this moment.where im actually supposed to be all out and going for it.throw all that force and effort.score straight A's.okay maybe 10 As and fail for chemistry.coz thats the only subject i cant do at all.absolutely no chemistry with chemistry.But if i studied well enough i know i could get 10As.For now,2 As down.And its all still hope.HOPE.8 As is not easy but no harm trying all my best.Gah,i dnt know what i'll get!!ahh,crap.But i promise myself not to regret anything.anything at all.so,wish me all the best or just shup up.Im not being mean,but if you're gnna say something,i know whats its gnna be so id rather not hear em over and over again.i know.have u heard of the saying 'its easier said than done'?Thats what im facing and im sure everyone faces that but my weakness is failing to break that.I shall not go on with this now.wish me luck.: )

hanged

a bit of poster colour n the rest water colour.
= )

Annexe rocks my socks!

im in love with annexe.Thats the best place on earth!i love the people and mostly the art there.Its awesome man.awesome!
So,i dropped by the other day just to check out the gallery.its nice ya know.lots of people.very cool.



Phew!one day,next year im gonna open my own gallery there!hahah for the sake of nuthin-to-do-after-spm.; )
Anyways!no one bought my prints:

BUT
BUT
BUT!!
This baby:

WAS SOLD FOR RM 30!
and according to jeany they were even fighting for it.whow!didnt expect that.So,sgtlah berbaloi what i did.
and..im doing this now.i mean selling my art.This abstract lomo can be ordered with band names of your choice.and of course the abstract will be different.I already have one client now.winks*and still selling for rm30.Rm 40 if its on canvas and using aqrilic.
my other art stuff for sale:

rm 30

rm 35

rm35

Ohkay.thats all for now.bdw,my prints are still available.rm 25 each.wish me luck people.!; )

ferck

My internet xberfungsi.dammit.im using my cousins now.lots of update about the annexe thingy but i cant type it out now.so,stay with me.Just to tell yea first that i made a few changes on the art work from my previous entry and also displayed 4 of my photography work there.Ill update when i get my internet back.so,do come back=)
ta!

My first art work to be displayed in public.

Well,i sure hope so.
My cousin Jeany,textd me yesterday saying shes doing an art auction at ANNEXE (WOWW!) this sat and sun.She asked me if theres any of my work that i would want to sell or display.I was SO thrilled.I mean ive always wanted THIS.This is it.The first step.And i dont know how she knows im an art person cause im really not close to her.anyways,god bless u so much sis jeany!But one problem though.I didnt know what to give her.All my work are just plain sketches and regular paintings on an art block.I dnt think that'll be good enough to be displayed let alone sell.So,I HAD to do something.BUT,im not sure if its good enough but i like it and im gnna give it a try.I don't mind if no one buys it.As long as its shown to the public,that'll already make me happy.;D

Introducing my (unfinished) work.


Okay,hahah,that is the only thing i could think of and capable of doing in the meantime.This is an abstract lomo with band names on it.Its about 20cm by 54 cm.Not too big or too small.Just nice i thought.The reason why i chose to do this is because I think that well,its more for youngsters actually and hopefully it COULD BE something that they would want to hang on their walls.yes,dream on.;p Its not fully completed.I have to paste them nicely on a cardboard and make a frame.yes,a wooden frame and paint it white or mustard(haven't decide).From tomorrow i have to search for wood.

The end result,i'll blog it another time once finish.Im excited but at the same time,not so sure if its ok to be displayed.
till next time.ta

guilty.

If theres a judge,i would be behind bars already and i would gladly accept it.

reasons:
1.for not attending alif's open house yesterday
2.for not being able to go to my bf's friend's opn house today.


From reason 1:
no transport.
Basically everyone that can drive were all out yesterday and i was left home alone.I felt very very guilty for not being able to be there especially because he came my house to invite me.I text him later that evening to say how much im sorry.He said its alright and we could catch up some other time.Then a bit later a new msg from him came in,"you know my house is still open and i can pick u up there if u want"gah,he was late!! i was already on my way out to have dinner with the family.Damn i didn't know that hes house will be open till night.So yeah,xde rezeki.

From reason 2:
Lini,az's friend invited me to her open house later at 3 pm.Again,no transport.My dad is out riding and my brothers out for raya.My mum is home but she cant send me there.Its bangi and we have to look for her house.WIth my mum's terrible sense of direction,we wont make it.Or even if we will,she won't be able to make it home after she drops me off.sigh.I feel terrible because az has always been there with me when i asks him to come along.He has met almost all of my friends.I havent met any of his except for petch.Hah,i really have to make it up to him some day.

From both reasons:
I NEED MY LICENCE!

people do come back. .

My mom screamed my name just this evening when i was resting peacefully in my bedroom.I was purging badly from 3 am last night.god knows what I ate.Anyways,i managed to get my fat ass up from bed right after she called.She told me my friend Alif was here,at my house.But i didn't quite hear what she said at first.Was it Alif or Ariff and here as in my house or on the phone.So I checked with her again and she said Alif's at the gate.I stopped and stared at her for a second.You gotta be kidding me i thought.I still could not believe what i heard.Maybe she heard it wrong.Maybe it was Ariff and not Alif.Alif is an old friend of mine.My ex's close friend actually,who changed school from saujana to victoria Institution in Kl last 2 years and never got the chance to keep in touch him ever since.He was very close to my ex before.Even went to Hong Kong together with my ex's family.And not to mention,was with us on our first date.Note that our first date was also the first time we've met.So,I went out to the gate and could not belive my eyes.IT WAS HIM! A L I F.I went 'oh my god' for like a minute in front of him and shaked his hands a lil too long.I missed him!we werent close(I believe its because my ex bf never liked me talking to other guys especially his friends) but Alif,he was everyones little brother.He has this cute character which everyone loves.And i can't believe how much i miss him.He was there!at my house and in front of me!He looked the same,and still has that kiddish character.And so I invited him in but he said he cant be long,his sister was in the car.He just stopped by to invite me to his open house this saturday.How thoughtful of him.I didn't think that he'll even remember me.The one question did pop though."how are u with ridt,still ok?"So,i guess he hasnt been catching up with him either.but he leaves just opposite of ridt's crib.hmm got me thinkin there.Anyways,i told him that im no longer with ridt and back to the invitation,i said i'll try to make it.Which this time,I definitely meant that.hihi.We were still amazed of how long its been.But he had to go.

So,the boyfriend called me a lil later.How thoughtful of him too=)Or maybe he wanted to ask if i was goin to art class.ahha,yea that was it.but hey we were on the phone quite long,talking crap.I actually miss him.And Im glad that everything seems to be better now.I think I understand what type of person he is.Hes not the type who would let his feelings out to me and everything but i guess,there must be some presence of love for me or at least care in him.Its a good thing that i did not give up on him.well,'kalau ada jodoh,xkan kemana"ahahah.ok,scratch that,thats lame.So,let me encapsulate and make it into one sentence:

Of all the things my masin mouth has complained about,that is every bit of him,i still very much like him,care about him,and still believe that theres hope.

There,ive said it.hmm.How did i get to this point anyways?All I wanted to say was,when i mentioned my bf,that i asked him to come with me to Alif's this saturday.N it got me into a confession.hah.=)If theres nothing more important than going to alif's,ill be there,as long as my bf could come along because i cant go there alone.

Thank u alif,love u n miss u much,old friend.
Thnx az,ur officially on the way to become my soulmate.For once i feel like i have a significant other and am glad that its you.=)

ill stop before i get all jiwang.hiihhi.n yes i refuse to talk about other stuff rite now other than my life with the bf.;)big issue.ahaha

friday night.

of bunga apis,mercuns,a beautiful night(although there were'nt stars twinkling above or a moon shining,i was happy that it didn't rain)and most importantly all the people that turned up that night who made it all happen.Many don't know each other because there were new friends of mine,old comrades,school friends and ex-school friends which we never get to meet or hang at the same time and place.But I was happy to see all of them getting along like they knew each other.now thats!unity
;D Malay,chinese and indian.Thats how Malaysians should celebrate.All the three(or more)races together.I thank all of you for coming.Oh I want to apologise to those who went back empty handed without me giving duit raya.Im terribly sorry,I was too busy having fun to remember that little thing.but no worries i will find you people(i'll try my best for ex-school mates)and give it to you.Also i want to apologise to my friends who got stung by some termites at my garden(ground bees,according to kusu,wth??;pmy bf burst out laughing when she said this which made her threw a tissue box at him.hahhah;Dhilarious).Ive already told them to be nice to you people but i guess they were to degil to even listen to me.Just accept it like love bites or more like love stings,alrite guys?hee.;DIt was an enjoyable night and the best raya i've had in years.Thats it,you people are definitely in my list for next year's raya.:D





pictures at www.picasaweb.google.com/liyanafnd

feel free to see or grab.

syawal akan tiba!

Di sini,ingin saya susun sepuluh jari jemariku meminta ampun atas salah dan silap,tidak kiralah dari kata2 mahupun perbuatan aku yang telah menyinggung perasaan.Sesungguhnya aku memang tidak sengaja.Oh,scratch that,yang sengaja pon,maafkanlah: ).Sebenarnya tidak berniat aku hendak lukakan hati kamu2 ini.Kamu semua sebagian besar dari hidupku.
1.mama dan papa
2.Fairuz dan Hafiz
3.cikjah,late aunty jai,aunty yah,aunty remah
4.Fye
5.miza,aiza dan nizar
6.bella dan thaqib
7.syafiq
8.azzari
9.petchai
10.shahrin
11.kawan2 non-muslim ku
12.rakan2
13.muslimin dan muslimat sekalian

1.
Mama dan papa.Jikalau hendak ku tuliskan segala dosa yang telah ku buat,sampai kucing bertanduk barulah boleh habis.ku tahu,aku anak yang derhaka.Tidak mahu mendengar kata tetapi tidak ada orang lain di dunia ini yang ku lebih menyayangi.Pendek kata,ku xboleh hidup dan tidak boleh ku bayangkan hidup tanpa kamu berdua..terima kasih atas segala kebahagiaan dan masa2 duka kita bersama.Kebahagiaan sentiasa datang bersama dugaan.Itulah hidup bagiku.
2.
Abang-abang aku,siapalah aku tanpa kamu berdua.Aku tak boleh bayangkan betapa bosannya hidup aku tanpa korang.Tak ada orang untuk cuit hati aku,buat aku ketawa terguling-guling,dan menyakitkan hati aku.aku ingat betapa gembiranya hatiku apabila korg kena marah dengan mama dan papa kerana menyakat aku.Padan muka!hahah.Seronok sungguh jadi the only anak perempuan.Bongsu pula tu.u guys pon terpaksa berkorban beberapa perkara demi aku.I cant thank you guys enough.You guys are the ones who coloured my life ever since i came into this world.hugs!
3.
my aunts.Speacially to cikjah and late aunty jai(although ur not here,u'll always be in memory and heart,i miss u so much.)You two have been like ibu ku sndiri.Jaga ku semasa kecil,melayan segala kerenah ku,masak untuk ku,membawa ku berjalan2 di kebun atuk dengan basikal buruknya,mandi perigi,dan mengibas-ngibas badanku dengan daun ape entah semasa ku dmm campak.Ku tidak boleh lupa masa2 dahulu.A typical kampung life and tidak boleh diulang lagi walaupun ku mahu ia berulang very badly.Semuanya telah berubah.Tidak sama lagi.Aunty jai pon telah meninggalkan kami.Apakan daya.
Aunty yah and aunty rhemah,i love u as much although we don't spent as much time together as i did with cikjah and aunty jai.Forgive everythin thats wrong.
4.
Fye,my closest cousin and friend.Kami berdua membesar bersama.wah terlalu banyak kenangan bersama lagi2 masa kecil sewaktu kita sangat sangatlah nakal omygod.Makan pon atas meja.mandi pon sama.Tdo,bermain,ke skolah,balik dari skolah semuanya sama2.hahah.ur like my twin and i louph u so much lah.hidup aku boring tanpa kamu couzie.maaf na,dosa2 yana terhadap fye.; )
p/s:rindu main 'kuda2 bantal'.hahah hanya kita berdua yang tahu.Walaupun kena marah dgn cikjah and aunty jai,kita tetap main secara sembunyi kan.degil sungguh.
5.
adik beradik fye.membuatkan family kami yang besar ni lagi kecoh.tu yang bes tuh.we rock together!trip ke mana2 saja kita pergi bersama.next trip ke morocco pada desember nnti.sangatlah tak sabar!
6.
belle n qib.minta maaf segala salah silap i.kamu org bes.sayang korang.
7.
okay im drained by now.hahah.ill make it quick.capik,ko kawan lelaki aku yang palaing first aku rapat.hang ni baik orgnya.dengar je segala masalah aku.aku pon dgr gak hang punya kan.selama ni xnah la kita gaduh and harap2 xdela gaduh2 ni.i pon happy la tgk u jumpe kekasih hang tu.semenjak tu xdalah cita lain besides ur kekasih.hahah,aku dengar ja.bes ke xbes ke,cite kawan aku akan tetap nak dengar.maaflah na kalau ada tersinggung masa kita busy luahkan cerita dan perasaan masing2.Thanks jugaklah for the masa nak borak2 tu.xde kau,susah jugak aku.
8.
Azzari.boyfriend aku.da 3 bulan kot kita bersama.satu hapak pon aku xpaham sama ko ni.pelik sungguh orangnya.Aku marah2 pon benci2 dalam hati pon,aku rasa aku sayang hang gak lah.tak tau mengapa tapi ada jugaklah rasa sayang tu.tah dari mana datang pon taktau.tapi aku ttp la marah kat hang.sebab tak balas balik kasih aku.ko xreti ke,atau xnak ke,aku pon xtau.aku cakap 'i love u' ko bukan nak balas pon.dulu hegeh2 nak aku,rajin msg skang hmph!rasa cam bodoh jugala aku ni.tapi aku xgiv up lagi la kat hang nih.nak tau gak cite hang.Kami boleh hidup dengan gembira tanpa contactin each other for more than a week.natural ke?xkan?haha.tapi itulah hakikatnya.Penat aku tgu kau msg aku tanya khabar.last2 aku jugak yang msg hang.hampeh betui hang nih.pe2 pon maafkan jelah ok.
9.
petchai.ko kawan paling baik kot aku jumpe.walaupun baru je kenal ko aku dapat tgk la,ko ni mmg treassure gila kawan.n im glad im one of ur friends.kite kenal kat art class masa nak habiskan projek seni yang bertimbun.last minute work,biasalakan petch.balik pon midnight nak menghabiskan tu.itu pon berhari2.lama jugaklah kita lepak.pegi hameed semua cari makan.hm,maaflah pe2 silap aku kat ko.rasa xde.heheh tapi manalah tau kan.
10.
Shahrin ismail.the drummer.aku pong baru jugak kenal hang ni.tapi fuh banyak gila aku tau sal hang.cam da 10 taun kenal lah.kalau kita borak tu,cam machine gun,mana taknya.besla kawan ngan hang.aku cita pon u dgr je kan.baik betul.penah hang skali ja ngan u.maafla xdpt buke puasa ngan hang hari tu.nnti2 lepeh spm kita lepak la sampai lebam na.yang lain pon maaf2kanlah.trima kasih banyak2 teman aku masa bosan2.ada juga org yang aku ley borak bersama cakap benda2 bodoh.sayang kau.
11.
kong,jane,shaloo,kusu,aneesha,chris,raja.u noe i love u ladies.maaf juga salah silap ku.muahhs

ok dah lah.selamat hari raya maaf zahir dan batin.

iTunes packed

More songs uploaded.From pink floyd to velvet revolver to oag to the darkness to blink 182 to keane to led zeppelin to queen to smashin pumpkins to lillix and to 3 doors down and to before their eyes.Hah,yes,a whole load of em!And yea,refered to my itunes for this whole list of em.Goin to upload more soon from michael learns to rock.The band that ive been listening to all the time when i was younger.I just remembered of them recently.'Ive got time!' hahah.I really should be studyin ey?

Anyways.Besides mltr,Bon jovi has the greatest ballads ever.buatkan saya jiwang all the time.Back to bon jovi!yes,they really have the very best ballads.Although most of em sounds pretty much the same,I still feel every song has its own uniqueness.And man,jon bon jovi still looks good altho age is really catchin up on him.



Oh,im gonna download songs from our very own lagend,P.Ramli.yeahh.Since lee lian has always been mentionin him and erg singin his songs like an old radio that cant be shut.grins*yeah,lee lian is an amoi.haha malu aku;p.So,soon Ill start singing along with her.And the kareoke after our spm.oh spm.hum,whats that?

hahah.bdw,life is treatin me bad!nough said.

New product.Go get it tiger!grrr;p

"herba produk.mencegah cancer prostat.Meningkatkan daya seksual.suami hebat isteri gembira;rumah tangga bahagia.Soyoung2u.com.call 03-42946436.CIK GEE"

BAHAHAHAHHAHAHA!!!i got this sms earlier on.what the ferck man.suami hebat isteri gembira??meningkatkan daya sexual?HAHAHAHAH! Is it really necessary to say all this?Man you gotta be kidding me.Im just wondering,is this more for the prevention of prostate cancer or more for the sexual arousement thing? think its more for the sexual arousement thing.It should be written like this then:

"herba produk yang pasti boleh meningkatkan daya seksual anda para lelaki.Suami hebat isteri pasti gembira.Secara tidak langsung,rumah tangga juga akan bahagia.Tambahan pula,herba produk ini boleh mencegah kanser prostat."

hah hahah.That should be it.
And i thought men have OVER 'daya seksual' already.They dont need this,what they need is practice.Muahahahah!

This really made my day.!Thank you,you stranger.
Man have i been gettin weird sms lately.

Are men facing extinction?

Hairan.Mana pi semua laki yang macho2?

I feel like there are more gays around compared to LELAKI TULEN.Is doomsday coming really soon?wallahuallam.Wonder what its like in 10 years time.When 70% of men turn into gays.Have you ever thought of that?I certainly have,by looking roughly on people these days.Its conspicuous.Its undeniable and so unbelievable of how big the number is.You'll definitely bump into a gay guy everywhere you go.Malls,mamak stalls,gyms u name it.They are everywhere!This is bothering me.I go to malls to get some eye candy aka cuci mata.And its so dissapointing to come home without a hot guy in mind to day dream of!haih,begitu kecewa.isk isk isk.

Manalah lelaki Melayu yang hot hot belaka.Yang bersuara megah which can melt a girls heart.Yang berbadan 'tough' (tetapi bukanlah macam arnold susahnaeja) dan bukan 'kempeng'.Yang bermata tidak terlalu besar dan tidaklah terlalu kecil(hahah).Gone,they're all gone.What is left are all the 'jambus' and the 'aws'.Lelaki yang tulen pon tidaklah setulen tulennya.Semuanya GEDIK.They think adorable is cute?Ahh,it maybe cute but pfft come on,I don't wanna marry an 'adorable' guy.I want 'macho'!macho man!For gods sake,TOUGHEN UP please guys.Too adorable can be annoying.Sure,!!you'll get all the attention u want badly from girls 'girls keliling pinggang',but them girls are not gonna fall for you.Don't you get it?They are going to be your 'bff',your bestfriends until one day you'll wake up on your little bed when you're 30 and realize that you don't have a real girlfriend and are still living with your parents.Hah,yes.Berfikirlah wahai lelaki2 sekalian.Jangan sampai tak kawin dan janganlah menyusahkan ibu bapa sahaja.And this is one of the factors of why men turn into gays.Plus,i didn't know that some guys can be so concious of what they do,wear or even talk.isk isk sungguh tak macho.Yes,get my defination of macho?good.

Second factor.Are you ready?This came from one of my guy friends from Indonesia.Bdw,hes not gay,its just his opinion.ahahahh;p.According to him,girls give guys too much pressure with their high demand on certain things.With that,they couldnt take it and they get too stressful,give up and turn into gays.Seriously,girls CaN be bitchy and so I cant disagree.But,why are you guys such sissies?Again,TOUGHEN UP please.Take everything like a man.Be a fuckin MAN.!

Its sad,really really sad.To all the 'pure' men out there,i suggest you people to be a little preachy and save your species!

a day with instruments

sara dan aku

i suck and thus i dnt deserve to be in the picture; )

di tgh2 malam begini.....

azzari,
Of all the sayang kamu(s) and i love you(s) i said to you that were seldom replied back,i still do miss you a lot.I miss your mengadaness and the fact that u have this very limited memory.(hahh).miss your weird craps.How you would speak only english with your british(or was it american) accent.Well,now you do speak malay.fuh.Miss talking to you through the phone where theres always silence between us after 5 minutes of talking,and we'll go..'soh..'back to back non stop for a few seconds till we find a new topic to talk about.ha ha.miss seein you.n so wanna cuddle with you again because you have the warmest hug ever although youre as skinny as a stick.Isnt it ironic?dnt u think?;)
i do really really miss you.and this is not a lie.theres so much more to know about you.Just hope theres time.
not in sight doesnt mean not in mind.

aku sayang kau lah gedik!; )

ur awek,
lyana

.......saya jiwang

gettin high with high

Downloaded a few songs from limewire yeaterday.One of em is james blunt's high.'High' really makes me FLOAT and really gets me HIGH listening to it especially at the chorus where he sings 'hiiiiiiigggggghhhhh' with that sweet and comforty pitch.ooouhh damn.Hes a genius;)
I know it has been released ages ago and the thought of downloading it HAS been clinging on my mind eversince but it just didnt pop out whenever i hang around limewire trying to figure out what songs to download.Soh,im really glad that it finally came back to my lil memory last night.
Also downloaded a few others of his'.Not my favourite though.Others include 'ironic' from the great alanis morissette,'Sing' by travis and 'The skin of my yellow country teeth' by Clap Your Hands and Say Yeah.A band from brooklyn.Been around for quite sometime already but i just knew this band and i have to say for this song they sound a lil like ozma at the begining and ending of the song and when i heard it for the first time i baffled for a moment.His voice.Its horrible!he sounds like a wasted drunken and dehydrated man when he sings that.I still like it though.The drum beats are simple,very basic but if its with open-and-close high hat it would make the song a lil upbeat and more awesome.Overall,love it.Them clap your hands and say yeah:

So,all these went into my lil ipod shuffle last night including the songs jayzuan gave me through the net.Well,his songs actually.hah hah;p.According to my ears,my fav among the 3 songs of his would be 'selamat tinggal'.But dangg,it just makes me laugh when the part where he sings 'maafkanlah salah laku' comes as he sorts of exaggerate his accent on the word 'laku'Hahah man u should listen to this.But overall,again,good song.sad,mellow.n Im thinking of jammin 'si dia';p.Its a fun song.Haha jayzuan tentu would be very flattered.;p
I also asked for free love's indierock darlin.Love that song.Great indie.
Oh and not to forget weezer's Buddy holly,hash pipe and perfect situation.I dont fancy buddy holly.Its too idk.Well,i just dnt fancy it.hash pipe on the other hand is a typical weezer.And i like it very much.Perfect situation,as many would have been very familiar to it,its A ok.

weezer.They still rock.
Yeap,thats about it.Bdw checked out pavillion just now.its HUGE!thats all i can say abt it.ha ha.
cheerio.

cash $$$

Last month was the first time i ever bought a 13 ringgit eyeliner from silkygirl(after discount).Of course,my mum was the one who was soo kind to pay for it .Well,after i did a long face that is.My usual eyeliner was a 4 buck eyeliner from chamelon.Im not a cheapskate,to tell the truth i can never keep my wallet fat.

Why?First reason.If i have money I would spent and spent and spent like theres no tomorow,bak kata perpatah,belanja tak ingat dunia.
Second.The reason why my wallet could not grow fat(with money) is simply because i dont have money!I get A BUCK a day for school,summing up to 5 bucks a week,10 bucks for two weeks and 20 bucks for a month with four weeks.Id be very lucky to get 25 bucks for a month.pffft u say,but i am not pulling anyones leg here..I really face money crisis that is very unbearable and unacceptable.With a buck a day,its jussssst enough for a bread with sliced sausages on top.Which with no comment,i do love eating that and wouldnt mind eating it everyday.And i could actually eat nasi goreng with a buck which i chose not to since it will blow me up like a balloon after a month.Anyways,ive surveyd the canteen food and anything thats below a buck is not my cuppa tea.SO,with a buck,i could eat good food but then theres aaaaaa liiitlllle problem.There wont be any savings!Im sure u'll say i could be smarter and pack food from home instead.Well,i just dnt want home food!hmm.
Im underpaid for going to school.And for this week,since i went to school only twice,i get TWO bucks which i wanted to save since its fasting month but rabaeh,our class' treasurer,came up to me and asked for two bucks for the class money.geez man.like what the ferck.;((
* * * *
about the eyeliner,i LOST it.i never lose my 4 buck eyeliner but when i was just about to use this 13 buck eyeliner for the second time,i couldnt find it!gahh.Ada toyol dengki kat rumah aku nih.!

I need to figure out how to make money from now on since i'll definitely be broke once i finish school.One way to earn money is to wait for raya.*grins*and of course,work.Or im thinking of making t shirts which everyone seems to be doing nowadays.There would be competetion but if they're nice and unique people still wont mind buying.Yeah,IF.And its all about talent here.Im good at copying stuff but not at designing.Ill still try though.desperate times,id do anything except the ones that require me to do something (and melt) under the hot sun.

And oh!i have 10 bucks in my wallet and need another 10 bucks for a new eyeliner.when is the 10 bucks coming??***in a million years.sigh.

yesterday was my aunts birthday.happy birthday!!i love you so so much.!!

just an old pic of us in pd.

Lastly,happy 3 months anniversary to me n the bf.ha ha.

blogspot an ASS!

WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED TO ALL THE PICTURES ON MY FREAKIN BLOG???
GAH,BENGANG BODO.

somebody tell me how to overcome this.i WANT the pics on my blog!

haih bosan

news flash:
graduation will be held at metro inn hotel in kajang.pffft!i prefer it to be in school where its a lil less formal and it'll be much more interesting and fun to do it at night.Since it'll be in metro inn,its from 9 freakin AM till noon.like ape kes ni buat pagi!bodo gila!im also not sure if my band can perform then.If its in school it would not be much of a problem or hastle.gah,everythins ruined.This is why i hate planin things.coz the plan NeVer goes as planned.forget bout this then.And im so not planning anything fer prom.I'll go with the flow~

Aku sangat lapar harini.lagi2 hujan,sejuk,bertambah lapar la aku.nothings stoppin me from eating tho.*grins.hahah,aku xpose.yeah nikmat,mari mari!

bdw,esok ponteng sekolah lagi.3rd day for this week.and hightlight for today is that i got to know next week is a week off!hell yeah baby.our adek2 is having their pmr and we'll get a week of freedom.
I went school just now and sat for 3 diagnostic papers.For the rest of the time,i was busy chit chattin with sara about no other than ducktoi and our local bands which are seriously gettin better nowadays.Im very impressed with the malaysian music industry which is very much improving.bravo!

To name a few bands:oag(always ware awesome),the times,couple,muck,free love, and hujan.they're awesome.Ill definitely try to catch their gigs once im 'allowed' to go out.To mohd Jayzuan from free love,tahniah juga.i bet ur duin well with ur solo career though i find ur songs to be rather too 'jiwang karat' for me;p.Jangan mara ye abg jay.Lyana masih dgr lagu2 kamu kemana jua.ahaks!cheers;)


free love

couple

hujan

MUCK

Jay

oag

support local music scene!
cayalah lyana.ahahaks;p

hah,perut pon dah berkeroncong.time to eat.*grins.once again.*
ta.